Psycho Goreman & Alvin and the Chipmunks

Pyscho Goreman

Cris: It's got a chocolate side and a biscuit side.

I mean, from what I could see outside, when I left from yours on

Sidey: sound,

Cris: It looked The man cave looks cleaner and nicer by way

Sidey: How? How dare you speak Ill of Wow the, well

Cris: Man, it doesn't look good.

Dan: Welcome to another episode of Bad Dads Film Review. We're pleased you could be here. I'm Dan. I'm one of the hosts. We've got another one over here to my left. Of course you can't see that in video world. But here it is. It's its name is Side.

Sidey: Hello.

Dan: We've got on my right hand side, a handsome devil goes by the name of Chris.

Cris: Bonjour.

Dan: And we've got the man who's gonna Give us a great intro, Simon, right here now.

Reegs: Welcome to Bad Dad's Film Review, the film review show that's exactly the same as hilarious and insightful podcasts like How Did This Get Made or The Rewatchables with just two crucial differences. Much like looking at your own face in a mirror, we'll be examining some grotesque horrors this week as we start with a special treat for you as we discuss the top five annoying voices and sounds replete with impressions, I hope.

Mmm.

Dan: the

case.

Reegs: Following

that, we're settling into our main feature, Canadian 80s action horror practical effects comedy B movie, Psycho Goreman. And before we finish things off with, off with the abomination, that is Alvin and the Chipmunks which if you've, Never seen before and you want to try and recreate the sensation of listening to then simply imagine shredding your own brain with a cheese grater made of pure irritation. Before we start, please do remember that if you're a sensitive soul, just a little heads up that there will be vulgarity and expletives. The last one, I'm afraid to say, I am particularly fucking guilty of.

Dan: Bollocks!

Reegs: Yeah, nice. Sorry, it's Tourette's kicking in there, Dan. Now, if you have been listening to the show for any length of time, you'll know we are broadcasting from Taxhaven Island, Paradise, Jersey.

But did you know that this particular channel island is home to a number of Neolithic sites and relics? Let's meet one of them now! Co host and resident Coffin Dodger, Dan! We also have Chris who's fear of the robot uprising is a reminder that even the most handsome faces can hide the weirdest features.

And there's also Sidey and you told me off air earlier that you were delighted with the result of the UK election, didn't you? As you never missed the chance to inspect a new member.

Sidey: That's right, yeah.

Reegs: And then there's me. Weeks. Hello.

Dan: Hello. Hello. Hello. I normally like to kick these, this part of the pod off with a summary of maybe things you've watched that we haven't included in the film. So have you seen anything beyond the Euro 2024 championships?

Sidey: i've watched

I'm upset with Acolyte. I've watched

Dan: Acolyte. That's the Disney Star

Sidey: tailing off quite alarmingly, I think.

Dan: The first

Reegs: first two episodes were really strong, weren't

Sidey: Yeah, they introduced this villain You know massacring an entire group of jedi and now he's someone who likes to like have a spa day in a rock pool and is thinking about philosophy and stuff and it's like what's going on here,

Reegs: on here?

Yeah, I don't know, I

Sidey: Yeah, I don't know.

I don't really get it. It's sort of a pg Anyway, I suppose it's always been for kids. I always have to remind myself about that. And I've been watching the boys, but yeah, I think I mentioned last week.

Dan: yeah, I've not got straight back into the boys again.

It's been a little bit difficult.

Sidey: hoping to have watched the new Beverly Hills Cop movie, but I haven't yet.

Dan: yeah.

I've seen the trailer for it.

Sidey: available

Dan: Okay what about yourself, Simon?

Reegs: No, not a lot Daniel. I have watched the first two or three episodes of The Bear.

Dan: Watched that, a

Reegs: enjoyed that season three

Dan: Oh, i'm not that far in

Reegs: I know because I've watched the first two seasons really like them.

First couple of episodes have been pretty decent as well of season three. So enjoyed

Dan: Nice. No

movie watching it was just all

Reegs: I did actually watch an Australian horror called Lake Mungo,

Lake

Dan: Alice

Reegs: About a girl called Alice who may have drowned

Dan: is alice,

Reegs: type thing. That was good. That was good. Quite an old one.

 

Cris: I've started watching this series. It's an Italian series called Suburra. It's actually in Rome and it's like a gangster kind of, but because I watched,

I don't know, in the last two years or in last year, I've watched Narcos, I've watched Top Boy, I've watched Ken, all these kind of

Sidey: lot of gangster stuff, a

Cris: a lot of gangster and a lot of, Series this after four episodes, it kind of gets into, although I like it because I like the Italian language as it sounds.

And I like the fact that it's more in Europe and

bits in Rome and features of Rome and everything. That's where in Rome, Roma and Ostia is where normally the action of the movie happens. But it's just, it's, it's, it has a very interesting orgy at the beginning with a Cardinal, one of the Cardinals that works for the Vatican.

He gets into an orgy and he overdoses on cocaine.

Sidey: Okay,

Cris: It's really, really good. You get to see his dick as well. He's in his fifties. He's not very nice, but he has sex with a really beautiful prostitute. But it kind of, I kind of, I can kind of see where it's going already.

Sidey: telegraphed it

Cris: yes. So, so it's a little bit kind of slow now.

I've also watched a movie called Brian Banks. It's a real life story of a guy who was saved by the Innocence Project. He was a American college football player, NFL, well, I don't know, American football player. He got accused of rape by this girl. He didn't do it, he pleaded, he took a plea bargain.

He did four years, I think. And then he is out and he's trying to Start a new life. And he's trying to clear his name and he finds out about the innocence project and he's, he pushes his way through to the guy, the guy's trying to help him starts basically clearing his own name in the end. He's actually one of the few people that managed to overturn a ruling in California, which has never been done before.

So it's, it's based on a true story is based on a true guy. And in the end, he finally makes it back to the NFL. So it's, it's a feel good story. And it's, it's not a. An A movie with big actors or whatever, but it's a, it's a, it's a nice movie. And I've also watched monkey man,

Reegs: Ah.

Sidey: Dev patel,

Cris: Patel. Yeah.

Which is if you like violence, it's good. I thoroughly enjoy that.

penis

Sidey: House of Dragon? No, not yet. There's supposed to be a really gratuitous Penis Is that what it is?

Reegs: there's some penis in it as

Sidey: that why it's gratuitous? Because there's always been sex scenes in Yeah. Game of Thrones. But this one seemed to flag up on my news feed a

Reegs: think I saw that there was an erect penis in it.

Cris: That's

what they were saying on the internet,

Sidey: Right. Okay.

Cris: yeah.

Reegs: I wouldn't, I've, I've never seen an

Sidey: the guy,

Cris: the guy

Sidey: not a stunt

cock,

Cris: the guy said it wasn't, no, no, the guy said I've seen it on, it popped on my Twitter feed the other day or this morning,

Reegs: the penis.

Cris: Yes. He said that the guy with the actual penis, he's attached to the penis. This

Sidey: that's how it works.

Cris: said that it's not a prosthetic.

Sidey: I

find that hard. I don't

Cris: don't know.

Dan: Okay. I watched a I watched a film with, Killian Murphy in it called Anthropoid. Have you ever heard of that one? It's

Sidey: it's

Dan: The Czech resistance so I watched it with the missus

Cris: about the Heydrich

Dan: yeah, and they, they go to kill Ryan Hild

Cris: Heydrich,

Dan: One of the great solution architects.

Sidey: Right.

Cris: final solution. I wouldn't call it

Dan: night

solution architects. Yeah, no, the final solution. And they, they topped him with a little bit of luck and, and he died from his injuries rather than fatally at the, at the execution site or the and then all that went on after that and the kind of The, he changed the face of the war Hitler.

afterwards had already signed an agreement called the Warsaw Agreement with other nations and saying, you can have Czech sort of leave the rest of us alone. Like you can have and when he started being over a little bit heavy handed as, as he often was um, yeah he would,

Sidey: quite

Reegs: Well, an outrageous accusation. Yeah. He,

Dan: he, he would

They kind

of withdrew from that and this was part of the reason why.

So they withdrew from that accord, and then the war started changing in, in different directions and things. But it was quite an interesting film. Cillian Murphy plays part of this Czech resistance, along with a guy who I think was in 40, no, 50 shades of grey, the, the main guy in that. So,

Sidey: jamie dornan.

Dan: yeah, I think it was him.

And Yeah, it was, it

Sidey: I'd like to see his dick,

Dan: It was, it was very watchable for those characters,

Sidey: Yeah. We did a Top 5 last week, which was Assassin themed. A couple of nominations from Beaver online. Angelina Jolie in Salt, or Zoe Saldana in Columbiana.

Reegs: Colombiana.

Oh

Sidey: Good Assassin perving material, he says, which

Cris: Yes.

Reegs: choice.

Sidey: It's probably true. I've not seen Columbiana, actually.

Dan: Puts the

Cris: it's good. It's good. I, I enjoyed it. I enjoyed colo. It's good.

Sidey: Should we crack on with this week's top five?

Dan: We should.

Well, that's perfect, isn't it?

Sidey: it? It would be, but I never broadcast those sounds.

So

Dan: that just for us?

That

Sidey: just for our listening pleasure. So this is top five annoying voices slash sounds.

Reegs: Mm.

Dan: Blobby Blobby

has got to be up there and the fact that I am only listening to that here is even maybe more annoying.

Reegs: Yeah. Because each week, I don't, the listeners won't know this, but since we did our episode of Mr.

Blobby, you've left the blobby sound

Sidey: got a sound effect, and we've got a sound effect pad, and I always press that one. Yeah. As a little, our little chapter

Reegs: So you hear all the cool little idents. Dun, dun, dun, dun, And we hear blobby, blobby,

Dan: dun dun dun. Blobby, blobby. And it soon gets old.

Sidey: Well, maybe for you.

Cris: I'm 100

Sidey: on board with Blobby.

I love Blobby.

Dan: Blobby.

I love Blobby. We experienced a renaissance when we did that

Reegs: We all experienced a Blobby renaissance when we did that

Dan: because Harry

Sidey: I was already there though because Harry Hill had brought it back in TV Burb and I just love it.

Ah, so good.

Dan: good. I'm gonna go, we talked a bit about Star Wars earlier

Sidey: I'm gonna go, we've talked a bit about star Wars earlier and I've got a Star Wars character to put in here from episode, well, from the prequel trilogy.

Reegs: I know, it's who this character's gonna be!

Dan: him.

Sidey: good?

They named him twice. Jja. Binks. Yeah. Um, who, I think his voice irritated some people a lot because he was kind of. found to be a little bit like a

Reegs: Well, it was, yeah,

Sidey: But I don't know if that counts when you're putting that onto a different kind of character. I don't know.

Reegs: and I can't

Sidey: But certainly people got upset about it.

And I can't do an impression of him because I can't remember and I'm not very good at It

Reegs: like Yeah,

Sidey: it was all kind of mispronunciation and Just this sort of annoying played for laughs character that wasn't funny. It was just irritating. Like his voice was irritating, but everything about him was irritating.

Yeah it

Reegs: gets his tongue wrapped around a thing and gets electrocuted and

Dan: Yeah, so I would heartily agree with that he was on my list as well binks blows

Reegs: well, I am gonna pick a Michael Bay movie. I have got Skids and Mudflap, the hideous, racist, caricature robots that speak Ebonics. And for some reason, Crave I mean, how racist can you get? He like, makes the He puts like an earring and a gold tooth in them as characters. Makes them speak Ebonics.

Makes them talk about fried chicken and watermelon. Like, one of them says they can't read. He's a fucking robot! Oh.

Sidey: It's like,

Reegs: oh, anyway, and they, Revenge of the Fallen, I believe it is this Michael

Cris: Ah, right, yeah.

Reegs: and they have like more screen time than many other

Sidey: Because they're so funny, get it?

Reegs: Yeah, because they're black.

They're so, yeah. So Transformers, Revenge of the Fallen.

Cris: I have a,

I don't know if it's necessarily their voice. It has to do mostly with their personality is all these celebrities that are celebrities without any talent. So I have Paris Hilton and all the Kardashians. As

Sidey: Yeah, as soon as one of them talks I'm getting

Cris: of them talks, I don't think it really matters. Is that a sex thing? I

Sidey: I've seen that Yeah

Reegs: for that. Is that a sex

Sidey: Yeah, i've seen the first film as well. I think that they are responsible for everyone and I mean children saying like

In every other words

Reegs: Who are you laying that on?

Sidey: all these, all these people, like, like,

Dan: like what you're saying like like like what what like

Sidey: Kardashians and, and all these sort of reality stars,

Dan: so

like annoying like isn't it

Sidey: very much so.

Cris: So these whole group of, there's no point, I'm not gonna name them all, but from Paris Hilton. to the Kardashians and the Jenners and all these kind of influencers for no reason.

At least Jenner was an Olympian. These women have no talent in anything, but they somehow are famous and they're millionaires and people care what they do. But the annoying thing is their voices.

Sidey: Yeah, as well

Reegs: there is like a kind of different type of like rhythm and speech pattern for tiktok influencers and stuff Like it's really fast and has a cadence to it.

That's different. Isn't there

Dan: it? I

Reegs: hooks on the algorithms?

Dan: So I don't know

Sidey: I don't know if a lot of it is because they're reading from norto q and it it times it and I don't know But yeah, you're right. It's just a

Reegs: a sing songy type quality to

Cris: the annoying thing, now that you've mentioned it, it just came to me. You know when you see a video and it's like, Why did I tell my husband to do this, but it's in a robotic voice?

Whoever has that, fuck off!

Sidey: the text to speech.

So you can tie, we do some training videos like this at work and you you type out the script and you,

Cris: how it sounds?

Dan: script.

Sidey: you put it into, and then you can select the voice style of robot or woman or whatever. And it does it in this generic, awful.

Reegs: will it do swear words?

Sidey: Yes,

Reegs: should we do next week's intro using it? Can I, if I give you, if I give you my intro,

Sidey: Definitely.

Cris: annoying.

Sidey: Done?

Dan: Chandler

Bing. Can you remember that?

Sidey: Janice.

Right.

Reegs: me about Chandler is everybody doing his. Could I be anymore making that inflection?

Dan: I be

any more

Reegs: And some people who base their entire personality around basically trying to pretend to be him.

I'm not thinking of any one person

but

Dan: any one person. Heh heh heh heh. Chandler. So, I started watching Friends again. Just ran a bit and it's still a bloody well written show. There's some really great gags in

Reegs: early seasons are

Sidey: say, I think the early ones have some sort of comments about relationships and, you know, living alone and blah blah blah.

And then it just descends into, like, horrible, lazy

Dan: so yeah, but the, the early ones and, and some of the ones that I've seen, I've enjoyed getting back into, but, but Janice then was annoying.

She's not got any less so over the years. And. With that combo with the chandler being could he be any more annoying? No, he couldn't

Sidey: because he's dead then. Um

Dan: um, no, it's a shame. But

Sidey: Have you seen there's a I think it's news night or a similar program that he's on the panel and it's the fellow Hitchens.

Is just basically laying into about being an addict And you know, it's your fault and you could just decide and he's like no like you're the you know You're saying that but there's countless scientific He just hammers him about he goes I can control the first drink or whatever I do And after that the addiction takes over and i'm not in control I can't do it and the guy's just like belligerently being a flamboyant going.

No, you're wrong and then obviously he's ended up the way it

Dan: guys. It's like belligerently big flamboyant thing. No, you're wrong.

Sidey: He has

Cris: Yes, he has, yeah.

Dan: there now. We don't know that he's left. We got a photo from him at the top nothing since

Sidey: to give him a piggyback

all

Dan: It would have been nice.

Yeah

Reegs: I'm not sure

Dan: not sure

if they haven't just kind of Put a a few rocks in a in an old bench up at the top there and just written it on themselves but

we'll give him the benefit of the

Sidey: He's raised eight billion pounds for charity, which is incredible.

Well done. Yeah.

Dan: for, he was only going for like Fiverr as

Sidey: Yeah, yeah, yeah. He's done well. He's done well. And he's annoying as well. So that segues quite nicely into the thing. Back to me are we I've got a similar voice style to our friend Janice, which is Fran Drescher in the nanny Did you ever watch that?

Cris: Well, Fran Drescher,

Reegs: just Fran Drescher, innit? Just in general,

Sidey: She had this like enormous kind of beehive sort of hairdo and That Janice I think Janice basically ripoff almost of her styling and she just it's the accent but also she shouts She's just really fucking loud and annoying.

I think she fucks the guy in the, who she's nannying for the kids, doesn't she? Yeah,

Reegs: I watched

Sidey: I've watched some bits, because it's one of those ones if you had a day off or you're off, it was one of those Channel 4 shows, it was on at like 10. 30 in the morning.

Reegs: In the morning. Yeah, yeah. King of Queens. Everybody loves Raymond. Everybody loves Raymond.

Ray Romano. He's,

Sidey: no they fucking don't. This one

with

Reegs: fucking annoying voice.

Sidey: Go for it.

Yeah.

Reegs: With him. Yeah. Yeah.

Dan: Him. Done.

Sidey: I nearly ended up gonna see him do standup in Las Vegas. Whoa. Gunned it so hard. Thank God in him Las Vegas. Why did you

Dan: why would you go and spoil your

time?

Sidey: I was there for some American friends 30th and they wanted to go and see that guy

Dan: right?

Sidey: and I think me and Norm was there as well.

We like fucking No way. Yeah.

Reegs: are you talking there had to be something better that

Sidey: night. Yeah.

Reegs: I'm putting Christopher Nolan in, not for his own voice, but for consistently making characters who wear masks inaudible in your

Sidey: It does seem like a conscious choice.

Reegs: you're doing it on purpose, and I'm sorry, it is really annoying when I'm like fucking around with the subtitles

Sidey: Well, I had a problem with this week's movie but that is short shit as well.

Reegs: Tenor and obviously Dark Knight Rises are pretty egregious in that capacity.

I have got changing tack a little bit, I've got some of the worst sound effects.

Dan: Oh, okay.

Reegs: The sound of a sword being drawn is always steel on steel, even though it comes out of a scabbard that's made out of leather, isn't it? I mean, you always get that. There's one screeching cat meow thing that you always hear.

It's the same screeching cat sound effect that they always use. And if there's a bin It gets knocked over. That's always got a screeching cat, that screeching cat inside it as well. Tires that squeal on a dirt road the cry of the red tailed hawk which happens whenever any bird of prey is on screen.

That yeah, that particular, you

Sidey: Uh, any time a band plays you get the feedback noise. Yes.

Reegs: And the Michael Bay dubstep like sub bass noise that they invented that happens before an explosion goes into slow motion now, you know, where it goes, like, Yeah,

Sidey: Yeah, yeah,

Reegs: That one, I'm putting that in as

Dan: and there's,

Cris: annoying how I like that.

Dan: there's

Reegs: all the time though. Everywhere. All the time.

Dan: There's a, there's a voice, I think it's called the Wilma voice, or Wilna voice, and it's the, it's the scream, the

Reegs: Wilma Wilhelm Scream. Yeah, Wil

Dan: scream, that's it, and it's that scream for everyone.

Reegs: it's just become a bit of a joke now. It's fun to hear it and like pick it out.

Dan: and Well,

Some

people's fun is somebody else's annoying.

Simon Chris, have you any more

Cris: That's why I'm going to put Napoleon dynamite because he's so fucking shit. Honestly, I'll never forget that. If I ever hear anyone speaking, I'm going to leave the room. I'm gonna run if anyone brings that guy up or that movie up

Reegs: You

Sidey: I could, aye.

You

Cris: feel free, but I, I can't, I'll just leave and I'll hide under the bed at home. I'm not even going to sleep in my own bed. That's how bad that is.

Exactly that. Also another one that will divide opinions is the space odyssey.

Except for the people that talk. All these other noises are just so annoying.

Sidey: But, oh,

Cris: They don't have to be so long! I get it, and first of all, it's a boring movie. Because I've only watched it 50 years after it appeared. And I get it. But Honestly. Oh,

Reegs: is this your fear of robots again?

Cris: No, it's just, it is my annoyance of unusual, unnecessary sounds. Yeah. It is not necessary for all that.

I don't see the reason for that. It doesn't, it doesn't add anything. It just makes you hate the movie more.

Reegs: you

Cris: And I also, in, in my defense for that one, I've only watched it maybe a few months ago with Kira's dad and he has a hearing problem. So we put the telly to a hundred

and

Dan: he's got

a what problem

Cris: hearing problem.

Yeah, that. So can you imagine the hour and a half or two hours, however long that movie is to hear that at maximum

Sidey: have been in your element

Reegs: That sounds great.

Cris: Oh, it was fucking shit.

Dan: i'm just gonna take register. Side bottom. Side bottom. It was Beulah.

The guy's name's Ben Steen. I'm not sure that he wasn't in The Wander Years doing the same thing, or there was an actor who pretty much just ripped him off and, and done the same thing, but he was, the, the teachers, he's trying to recreate that annoying teacher voice that was reading Register out to us when we were kids and it would go through all the peoples and there was always some kid that wasn't there each and every week,

Reegs: It's like the very worst teacher as well. And it like no attempt to engage with the students

Dan: monotone just monotone, um Beulah,

Reegs: like the classes, everyone's like asleep on their desks.

And

Dan: yeah, and people are more interested in picking their nose or, or finishing off the doodle on their desk or, you know, flicking a piece of paper into somebody's ear and the teacher's voice often would just help everybody into that mindset because they were so boring and so annoying.

So, I shall add that in because it is a slight nod to my own, own youth.

Sidey: Child voices. Yeah.

Dan: all

of them,

Sidey: Mostly,

Yeah. That fucking annoying little bastard in the old Western Shane.

That kid is fucking dreadful. I fucking hate that, I'm never gonna get over that in my life. Peppa Pig is an entitled little shit.

Reegs: shit.

Sidey: Horrible to our old man as well. She can fuck off. We may or may not have got on with Alvin and the Chipmunks, find out later. No,

Reegs: no, it's, I'll tell you right now. I fucking hate that program. It is my number one. I'm not picking

Dan: Alvin and the Shit

Sidey: the Chipmunks. And another sound effect is the dial up internet sound. Yeah.

Reegs: sound.

Oh

Sidey: From the old modems. Yeah. She used quite a lot. And you've got Male

Reegs: Genitalia. Okay.

Sidey: Yeah. Which is a Tom Hanks film. So another reason to hate it I'm out.

Dan: it's not it's not one of those Triple X films.

Sidey: No.

You've got Nailed.

Dan: Yeah.

Reegs: I gonna put what's, what was his fucking name? I've just had a quick, what, Pierce Brosnan?

From Mamma Mia. If you remember that film, it's the one where Amanda Seyfried invites Pierce Brosnan, Colin Firth back to the

Sidey: To bang her mum.

Cris: create

Reegs: basically to recreate the gangbang that caused her

Sidey: her conception. And

Reegs: they all trapped in this dystopian nightmare where they have to sing ABBA songs the whole time.

And,

Cris: that movie. What's

Sidey: we all enjoyed that one.

Dan: all

Reegs: um

Sidey: Gimme gimme a man after midnight.

Reegs: yeah, so, I would say, no, I did not like that movie. I, I fucking despise ABBA. So that is what, yeah.

Sidey: so, many ABBA tunes at my wedding. yeah,

Reegs: it's part of my like some nightmarish. Yes.

Yeah, there's shit. I'm sorry. Yeah. But anyway, there's a reason they used to dub actors voices when they were singing in musicals and Pierce Brosnan in that movie was it.

I've got just my nomination left, I think, as well. That's Heidi.

Cris: Okay I've only got two, two others. Renée Zellweger, which I think she's really annoying, and her voice is meh meh meh, I don't know, she always speaks on her nose, like meh meh meh,

Sidey: Nasal, yeah,

Cris: it's just so annoying. In any movie. She, she can't really change. That's her personality. And I don't dislike actors from New York.

But Sebastian Maniscalco and Pete Donaldson. Jesus really

Sidey: Yeah. I really get Pete Donaldson

Cris: be their personality, again. Which, that could just be just me. But both of them, I just find, again, without Are you Pete

Reegs: Pete Donaldson?

Sidey: King of Staten Island.

Reegs: Oh, Davidson.

name? is? Yeah.

Cris: All right. Sorry. Donaldson Davidson.

Same thing.

Dan: It's Same

thing. I know who you

Sidey: I know you. Potato Patai.

Reegs: Yeah.

Cris: It's honestly, I don't know. I just find them both so annoying and I've listened. I know they're both actors and I just think they can only obviously do one thing that they're from New York and they represent New York because that's how thick their accent is and how cool they are in that accent, but also in their standup.

I've tried to listen to the stand up and I just couldn't get through it

Reegs: He's got a massive wang though, Pete Davidson. I don't know if that

Dan: Don't we all? Anyway,

Sidey: how he's getting all the chicks, is it?

Cris: don't know.

Reegs: a huge, I know you don't. Well, I've

Cris: I've never seen it, so

Reegs: true though. Apparently he's got a massive dick.

Cris: Okay, well, even if so, I don't care

Sidey: it. He doesn't talk through it, so it doesn't really change anything.

Cris: So that's, that's where I,

Sidey: But you're putting,

him in?

Cris: Yeah, them two This

Dan: I've just got a couple, like you mentioned, all kids' voices terrible accents.

We had that Gilbert got free who's like,

it speaks like that a lot of the time. That's pretty annoying. Pee wee Herman, everything he's ever been in. That was super annoying. Yeah. Matt Damon only just so I can say Matt Damon. And of course you've got the famous Dumb and Dumber noises. We haven't mentioned

Reegs: annoying sound in the universe.

Dan: and then you've got the other one where he rings the bell in Dumb and Dumber too, like a billion times. Because that's the second most annoying sound in the world. We are going to talk about Alvin and the, the chipmunks, so it leaves me to put in the spaceship from the flight of the navigator is a super annoying sound.

Reegs: What does

he comply compliance or whatever

Dan: comply. Navigator. He's got

to

Sidey: It's gotta be jaja Bs, right? It's gotta go in. Is it? Yeah.

Reegs: I'm putting in your own voice because well yours or yours or your own voice because everybody finds their own voice annoying when they hear it.

Sidey: Not after doing this for four years.

Dan: Yeah, it's not top five, but all right. Yeah, go

Reegs: yours is probably the top one

Dan: top.

Sidey: putting Pete?

Reegs: Oh yeah, Pete Davidson,

Dan: Well, let's hear the rest. You annoying bastards

Sidey: Yeah, nominate

Reegs: You with your annoying voices.

Sidey: completely new to me, this one.

Psycho Gorman.

Dan: Gorman.

Sidey: Dave Gorman's brother.

Reegs: Gorman's

Sidey: 2020

Reegs: I just don't know where you found me.

Dan: check.

Reegs: shudder.

Sidey: sad to report, because a lot of the time, When I was watching this, I was thinking, I wonder what Chris is making this. Chris didn't watch it.

Cris: I didn't watch it, no. I didn't have time. And all the movies that I said previously,

Sidey: previously. You may

Cris: the movies that I said previously, I watched them when I went to Romania because that's when I had all the time and I didn't do anything. But I've been busy last week and I watched the football in the evenings when the football was on.

And then yesterday I had the choice between, because I looked at the, what's on And luckily I've seen Dan and he said that he's watched The Killing. I've seen you on Friday, I think and I've seen you in the evening. He said, I watched The Killing and it was good. And then I've, I've, I didn't watch the trailer for The Killing, but then I, I had only one option because one evening on which to watch, and I've seen the trailer for this one and there was only one winner

Reegs: Yeah,

Sidey: well

Cris: it wasn't this

Sidey: Maybe we can convince you to to go back and check it out

Reegs: So, this is by writer director Stephen Kostansky, and he has, he's like a bit of a special effects guru, he's worked on Pacific Rim, and he's done prosthetics and practical effects for a host of TV shows and movies that you will have

Dan: Any relation to George Costana?

Sidey: Yeah, I think

Reegs: so he worked on Hannibal Suicide Squad, Capote, so, and he's written and directed a number of movies in his own right, including Biocop, Manborg, and Father's Day.

But the only one I've yeah,

Cris: only one

Reegs: only one I've seen is The Void which was pretty good. I enjoyed that. This is a kind of Troma esque Yeah,

Dan: Yeah, it's a real mash. And it's It's monsters, isn't it? It's monsters. It's gore

Sidey: Well, it starts off with two kids playing a kind of

Reegs: other. We get text

Sidey: text crawl. Yeah, we do, actually.

Reegs: Sort of the many, first of many throwbacks that give it like an 80s throwback type dark fantasy film, like Kral or Masters of the Universe, some scene setting. And it's talking about on the distant planet of Gygax, there was this nameless evil overlord who was toppled from power by the forces of light.

And just before he was about to wipe out all light from the galaxy, he was imprisoned in a place beyond. Never to be released and then the camera pans up and we see earth dun dun dun. And then

Sidey: Yeah. And the, I think the the, the, the sphere of earth becomes one of the balls. 'cause they're playing a, I forget what they call it now, what is ball? Crazy ball. It's sort of like dodge ball,

Dan: But it's more of their own rules made

Sidey: weird things going on. It's really complicated.

Dan: good. There's some of their own rules. I thought but we play this game a few times through the movie

Sidey: Well, they're playing it in the first time we've seen they're playing it and there's some like 80s loud guitars which then stops and it looks so much more ludicrous without the music playing and they're just like lamely throwing this ball at each other.

Dan: right. Yeah, it's it's quite like really cool and what you can imagine their imagination is the music's on but then when it all just winds back, you see two kids in the yard just throwing balls at

Sidey: it's very obvious from the get go that the little sister is the really domineering one. She's like rules the roost and effectively bullies him, the older brother and totally has her way.

Reegs: And the loser of Crazy Ball, as it is when you lose Crazy Ball, you have to dig your own grave. So he does. Luke, the older brother, digs his own grave. And he eventually discovers this like, pink,

Dan: Well, she gets him digging down a fair way.

Didn't she? I mean, it's it's the full required depth of a grave

Reegs: Yeah. And there, there's this pink glowing orbit.

It's like stuck in the ground in this circle thing, which Mimi kind of just jabs her finger mindlessly at Later on there's a good gag because the, the evil overlords like, oh, we, we programmed it this

Sidey: they do it they go it's like buttons and she goes one two three and and it like opens and he goes wow first

Reegs: he goes, wow, first time. And so it releases this orb and then the gray and it starts glowing. And then the ground starts like,

Sidey: they freak out, don't they?

Reegs: pink and shaking. So they sort of hurriedly cover it up

Dan: Well, that's it. They put all the dirt back on and they've dug a big old hole. But

Sidey: then the mum, the mum looks out and she's like, what do you like

Dan: you like? You used to come on. I've called you in. And Of course, there's some, you know, some evil lurking underneath, but

Reegs: later when Luke goes to bed, he says to his dad, who looks a bit like Bob

Dan: He does, yeah.

Reegs: says to him, Dad, is there such a thing as monsters? And he's like, well, son, in a lot of ways, humans are the real monsters.

So I'd say yes.

Dan: But mum's not having that and she's saying, Look, Just get him to sleep dad there's no monsters

Reegs: It's actually the first of many times that they disagree, right? The parents, because they disagree the whole way through the movie.

Dan: Yeah, that's right as the kids do as well, And also she's asking about monsters. So the parents are a little bit suspicious That's two of you asking about monsters tonight.

What's going on? Oh, no, nothing. Nothing. Nothing. But there is something lurking

Reegs: well, because the action shifts to a bunch of thieves at an abandoned shoe factory, and we get the emergence now of the monster, which is a sort of mighty morphing Power Rangers esque sort of villain who like, Quotes, like almost Shakespearean dialogue, something like a hell raiser.

He's talking constantly about endless bathing in people's blood and that sort of thing. And two of the thieves are instantly decapitated. He rips their heads completely off. There's this

Dan: Yeah, it's it's a little bit of a nod to the terminator scene this way because he's in the Shade at the back, isn't he?

There's like a lip area behind him. You just see his silhouette and he's like, come on, gimme your clothes, or, or whatever it is he's after at that stage,

Reegs: And a bit phantasm y as well because he uses his

Sidey: Yeah, he can kind of telekinesis see

Dan: you start to get so the, the

deaths are

Reegs: guy, the third

Sidey: third guy says I don't want to die and he says very well

Reegs: live forever, he says. And then he turns him into this nightmarish art installation thing with like spikes coming up through his body.

Yeah, it's the third guy that he turns him into that.

Sidey: see

Reegs: see him again later, yeah

so anyway the next day the family discover the big hole in the garden where he's

Emerged psycho gore man dad is tasked with the job of filling in the hole and then he immediately injures his hand and on the first

Dan: Yeah, can't

Reegs: Don't even look at it Susan.

It hurts And then we meet future love interest character Alistair who will have an interesting journey You

And eventually Mimi and Luke, anyway, they'll follow the footsteps from their garden through a trail to the abandoned shoe factory, and they'll find the monster who will

Sidey: Well, they see the corpse first, don't they? They see, well, they see the remains of the two guys that have been decapitated, like you say, just they're like scattered on a, on a, like a wire

Reegs: It's like flesh,

Sidey: They're just like a pattern. But then the guy who said he didn't want to die, he is sort of impaled, like you say, he's just all twisted and, and undead. And his eyes are just going round and round like a fruit machine, because they just like rotating around. And it gets better for him as well.

Reegs: Yeah, it really does.

Sidey: Yeah. they, do.

Reegs: it. they do.

Dan: Gorman and

Reegs: He

gives a bit more backstory, doesn't he? Like the, I'm the Archduke of Nightmares and all this stuff, and you know, he talks about being a deadly warrior imprisoned on Earth and all this stuff. He's going on a, and she then, as he's going on it's stopped almost like a record scratch in the middle of it, cause he's, she's got this pink diamond orb thing that we saw at the beginning, which means she can control this evil alien overlord.

Dan: He, he talks about, as you said, you know, so you go, the horrors you have witnessed cannot be unseen. Your young minds will carry them until it consumes you in a miserable death. And they'll go, Oh yeah, cool. And there was a lot of that kind of dialogue going on which,

Reegs: Well, Mimi is quite often quite bored by him telling him to shut up and getting him to

Sidey: it. He's very one note, isn't he?

Reegs: Yeah. he is. Yeah. Yeah. So it's at this point ac Luke accidentally destroys the sort of Chad statue. He like bundles into it and it smash

Sidey: It just disintegrates. Yeah.

Reegs: and there's like a mouth and eyes on the

Sidey: gob. The

Reegs: The mouth goes tha it mouths. Thank you, doesn't it? As he's like. anyway, she, this is the point where she christens him Psycho Goreman PG for short, after trying out a number of different other names.

Dan: Not to say this film is a PG cause it's not. I mean, it was a 16 cause it is quite gory. A lot of the deaths.

Reegs: Yeah,

Dan: And we've

Reegs: it's so bizarre because, and he's still going on about, you know, unimaginable power and the pain and madness he's going to inflict and they just treat him like this big dork and leave him in the shoe factory.

And then we cut actually from the glowing orb. This was cool in Mimi's hand to outer space and impressive looking practical effect model where the planetary Alliance is sitting. And there was another great array of like practical effect. Creatures here, there was this lizard thing, like a blob of mush with eyes and a brain in a jar type creature he was called the tube man.

Dan: Hmm.

Reegs: you, like him? Yeah. And they are, they were the ones who imprisoned psycho goreman in the orb at the behest of the Knight's Templar,

Dan: Yeah, we are really tapping into anything this guy's ever heard of before everything from,

Reegs: it's all in

Dan: Terminator to Knights Templar to this is Superman him being in an orb going around space and everything.

Yeah, you know, he's, he's, he's not making anything original here. He's just tweaking it to suit.

Sidey: the, the, the chair person, whatever her name was, is it Pandora?

Yeah. She brings in, they've, they've, they've captured an earthling, a human being, brought her into this board meeting. And, did they take her heart? She

Reegs: it's like That's right, it's a meat

Sidey: That's right, it's a meat cube, which she then smushes, like, squashes on the table, and then smears all over

Reegs: herself, which

Sidey: which then gives her the ability to take on the form of this human being. Yeah. So that she can walk, she can then go to Earth and walk amongst us. Yeah. Yeah.

Dan: And, and she wants to go down because she has to imprison

Sidey: They've, they've obviously got wind that he is out. And, you

Dan: And they understand the power he holds as well, that he really can, he's a bit like Thanos.

Reegs: But also, you know, you understand they're not the goody two

shoes

Dan: goody two

Reegs: evil and more

Dan: evil and more evil. She comes out of the story for a little bit because we get

Reegs: She, she comes out the story for a little bit because we get some like fish out of water stuff. They go back to Psycho Goreman with others, with Alistair. They give him some TV and magazines. They apologize for not having porn.

This is where he's looking in the magazine. He's like, She says, oh, there's hunky boys in there. And he says, I do not care for hunky boys. And then he looks a bit closer and he's like, or do

Dan: I?

Reegs: So good. And more story about how he was a slave building churches for the Templars and all that stuff. And

right.

And we actually see him in huge form and thousands dead and all this sort of stuff. But it bores the kids, this story. So they just leave. Alistair says nice meeting you and he says it would be nicer if you were

Sidey: I

think that quite a lot of work

Reegs: And

when they leave he uses the tv to call the his army the paladins of obsidian because that would be important because they'll turn up later. They'll go for dinner at the house which is where the boys, they fuck off upstairs to play video games, and she's got a big crush on Alistair, and she doesn't like the fact that they're playing video games, so she calls Psycho Gorman and asks if there's anything he can do and he has a quite innovative solution to turn him into this giant

Sidey: mutant

Reegs: brain tentacle creature

Dan: It's

a huge brain with eyeballs.

Sidey: like a big version of Krang from um, Turtles.

Reegs: And he will remain that way for the rest of the movie. Yeah,

Dan: for the rest of the movie. Then you get some like, a montage. We

Reegs: we get some, like a montage.

We get like a Billy Idol, rebel yell, homage with PG being part of the family playing the drums in the band, practicing

Dan: they have a couple of crazy little song moments.

Again, he's seen that somewhere, the director, isn't he? Oh, they, they put a, a song in, in some films. So I'll do that. And

Reegs: We get a trying on clothes montage even so

Yeah.

Dan: That's right, yeah, Gorman gets a few different suits on

and

the usual goes into the changing rooms, comes out wearing absurd clothes, everyone has a lol, and he goes back in again to try out something equally as, as bad the next time and, yeah, it, it's starting to, to heat up a little bit because the net is closing on Gorman,

Sidey: we get those two police officers get involved, don't they?

They approach

them,

Reegs: officers get involved, don't they? They approach them. He's

Sidey: He's

Dan: he's, he's, and he's with two kids, so he's looking pretty threatening, but he, he soon disposes of one of the coppers

Reegs: He mutates it into this, like, horrible, it's a bit like

Robocop, Yeah,

Dan: And the other, the other copper is desperately trying to get into the car. At one point he goes, Dave throws the keys and Dave's like who's just turned into the undead isn't he he wants to on some level but he just can't compute it

And the copper

Sidey: think he's got, the gun is kind of like melded into his hand,

Dan: yeah yeah and it just keeps going off doesn't it it just keeps on

Reegs: Well, it's, it's actually a bit later when there's a scene where, you know, Psycho Gorman is explaining, or having explained to him the concept of love and he's repeatedly trying to kill himself in the background.

Sidey: fact,

Reegs: In fact,

we might as well leap to that bit because Pandora's come to earth. She's going to interrogate that cop that you were just talking about there with some horrible glowing shit. And then Psycho Gorman, whilst walking home is going to be accosted by his army. This is another crazy bunch of freaks, like a, a witch baby thing and a sort of like the Night King from

and a sentient cauldron of blood and meat parts that walks along and they get into a big old fight because the, his army enjoyed Not having him around they'd they'd come to some sort of like power sharing agreement

Dan: Yeah, well, this is it. The, the people that had thrown Gorman in this orb that was circling space forever and, and kept him down and buried him and everything they, they cut a deal with him and said, well, you know, we do a little bit for them.

They do a little bit for us. Life's pretty good. So you being here suits us. Poor, poor Gorman. He's, he's upset with that, isn't

Reegs: he?

And

he's eventually they eventually duke it out after he's forced to apologize to Mimi and Luke for trying to kill them

Dan: Yeah, and their little idiot family.

Reegs: And eventually that's a lesson that Mimi will learn. She'll learn to say sorry, 'cause end. So anyway, there's a big fight and he dispatches all of those.

Dan: minion, kind of people in his gang, yeah.

Reegs: Then they've got to get home and Psycho Gorman has been injured so they have to call Dad which they do while he's having a shit and like telepathically beaming to him whilst he's having a shit to come and pick him

Dan: for him to take isn't it? He falls off the toilet. Our bob odenkirk look alike and he's just like fuck Fuck man, why is that because it is really an invasion of his privacy

Reegs: privacy. Yeah, so he ends up picking them up and they come home at which point Pandora has turned up in human form and aligned herself with Susan and there's been this big split. Susan and Greg are not a happy marriage, they're always fighting and now they are ideologically split over what to do with Psycho Gorman.

Greg backing his daughter and taking Gorman back to the shoe factory and Susan staying behind to be mutated into another robot being by Pandora.

Sidey: Yeah.

Reegs: As we race to the conclusion of the film.

Dan: Yeah,

Sidey: Showdown, It's like, a little bit like Avengers well it's Captain America Civil War, isn't it? Where you've got the family is split. Yeah. So you have, is it Mimi? Dad, and Psycho Gorman,

Dan: On one

Sidey: Pandora Mum, and that

Dan: And there's only one way they can sort it out is crazy ball, of course we've already seen the switcheroo go and take places when two balls hit each other It's the first one to get land a successful punch and it's all building up to the switcheroo happening again which after an epic dodgeball crazy ball game is Is what happens and Mimi comes and punches her brother again, didn't

he?

Reegs: her brother again, didn't she? Yeah, that's it.

Dan: That's right, yeah. He's kind of, yeah, that's it, his bone, it comes off the side, doesn't it? And you see him shuffling towards the car going, oh, it's really bad, it's really bad.

Okay,

Reegs: form. I think she accepts that she was being too harsh and the whole thing

Sidey: I think it resolves itself.

Reegs: so they, yeah, she, that all resolves itself and

Dan: well, it's a sweet place.

Reegs: Luke and Mimi will, Mimi will apologize to him by that knocking thing that they, they,

Dan: That's right. They've got some

Sidey: Psycho Gorman's been wounded. He's bleeding this kind of yellow, greeny ooze.

Dan: That's right. Yeah.

Sidey: Because they had done something to the weapon to Like the Nazgul, when they get Frodo, and he's got this wound, and he said, The only way you can heal me is you gotta give me the gem.

Dan: gem. Give him the gem.

Sidey: you said you were gonna

Dan: Kill everyone.

Sidey: Yeah, we can't.

Reegs: can't. I

Sidey: saying about and he's like, well, I promise

I won't

Dan: won't. Whenever we've asked you, you've said, I promise I will. And I will kill all your family, all your idiot friends, and everybody else you know. And you're like, You promise you won't? And he's like,

No, I will I will I'll do it. So, they are a little cautious and given it to him But bob odenkirk who isn't really bob odenkirk then goes and says to his daughter when I was a kid, I was a dickhead and I did this and So he tells her to be a dickhead and give him the stone

Reegs: Well, actually the story, if you remember it, Dan is a bit more confusing than that. 'cause he says one day after school there was a creepy, weird guy who wanted to show me collectibles in his van.

And I went in it and I saw the most amazing collectibles I've ever seen. So you should go with your heart, but it's a pretty confusing story.

Dan: Yeah, it was a little bit like I went to see a guy and got into his van and asked to see puppies and he was never seen again. So it was quite close to that story.

Sidey: But they do

Dan: they do.

Sidey: give it up. They give up the gem He is healed and he does leave them alone But he does fuck off to somewhere else and just cause

Reegs: Well, he, he does, he kills Pandora, she's gone, especially enraged about the hunky boys in the magazines. And then he does promise to leave him alone, then he opens a portal to their town and you just see him walking off, blowing up cars and like, eviscerating

Dan: says he'll leave them alone, but they kind of watch him in this, you know, this

Sidey: They get some newsreel footage of him, just like

Dan: he, he's destroying the world as he said he would.

Reegs: the world as he said he

Sidey: Well that's how the, that's how the credits roll and that's what plays out is just that family having dinner with Alistair in massive brain form And then it just fades out.

But then there is a post credit scene with the council of idiots. And it's like, well, we need to plan B and one of them just puts it like a six year revolving on the table and goes so who's going to kill himself

first?

Dan: on

Reegs: man arm. There was a great moment earlier on when she smears the blood on his face. Because tube man hasn't got any eyelids, the guy next to him puts his hand over his

Dan: hand over his

Reegs: Anyway, yes. So, that. And there's a kind of rap over the credits as well.

Real good rap. Real good. Rap summarising the events of the film as any good movie like this

Dan: film as any good movie like this.

This isn't anything that would be on my radar. A horror, a B movie horror

and and nobody I've ever heard in it before. I mean, there seemed to be very little reason for me to, to watch this film other than the fact that Reeds had said, This will be the one for the pod. Glad I did. I, it pleasantly surprised me.

It was maybe my expectations were low and I think that helps. So don't let anything I say big this film up, but it was, had more than a couple of chortles in it, which. I'm a grumpy fucker. So that that counts and also Just that the idea that the influences from other films the the tongue in cheek way.

They didn't take it seriously at all, allowed them to get away with that the the actress the the I i've read a couple of mimi who played mimi and a and a few others They said oh a few people said they were really annoying and didn't like it. I actually thought she was really good in this. I thought there was enough personality within her performance that it carried over her character.

Gorman, as I say, it was, it was, it was pretty funny. It was I enjoyed this. I was pleasantly surprised Riggs.

Cris: Where did you, sorry, where did you, what channel was this? How did you find this movie?

Dan: Is it Annetta's one?

Reegs: can watch it. You can rent it on prime.

Cris: Alright, okay.

Sidey: I didn't get on with it. I have to say That's putting it mildly.

Dan: I struggled

Sidey: really struggled with it.

The trouble with it is if the jokes don't land and you're not feeling it

Dan: not feeling it,

Sidey: It's a lot and it

It just it just carries on in that vein and it wasn't working for me. So I just You know, at one point I checked the timers, oh fuck, I've still got

Dan: that's going to happen. Yeah.

Sidey: and then I checked the, oh gosh.

It's really painful. It just, it's just a bit of a misfire for me. That's all. It's, it, it's gonna be a polarizing film, but I would say there's, there's no middle ground with

Reegs: It's not going to be,

Sidey: no, no one's gonna give this, like, oh, it was all right.

Dan: a polarising film, but I'm saying there's no middle ground with it. It's not gonna be, yeah, it's not, no one's gonna give it a shot. You know,

budget. You could see that

Reegs: really like the, like just trying to such grand ambitions on such a, you know, limited budget and the effect work and the creature design. I really, really enjoyed all of that.

And it, I did find it funny. Sometimes it was funnier in description and maybe funnier in the script than it was in execution.

Dan: execution. Well, I think I said to you at one point over the last week, I said, was this a PG? Because it had PG Gorman, and I think that's what confused me, and I was thinking, because it seemed a little bit

Sidey: I think there was too much

Dan: for, but it was all tongue in cheek,

Sidey: I think that there was only a few bits they, they would needed to cut to get a lower certificate. The violence is very cartoonish and I

Dan: at a lower certificate. You know, it's the kind of thing I think, you know, if it's not

Sidey: only the beheadings that are Yeah, the worst bit,

Reegs: Even the language is because they use frig and stuff

Dan: Yeah, and, and, you know, I would think that Yeah, my daughter wouldn't mind that take about a little bit of the gore out. Yeah, you know the beheadings and things but But even then you can see they're not they're not real.

I mean they they go spectacular Don't they and it's blood and it's gore and it's it's it's not they've not done it for realistic to try to convince anybody the head has actually been lost

Sidey: But you enjoyed it Riggs?

Reegs: I did. I did enjoy this one, yeah.

Sidey: 2 out of 3,

Dan: Two out of three cats don't say it's bad. Did you like it as well? You could just say yes and go or no and even up.

What do you think?

Cris: That

was definitely not for me.

Dan: Wow,

Sidey: I, I think when I was watching it, I was like, wow, I think Chris will hate this more than Napoleon Dynamite.

That's what I

Cris: No, I, I just, I told you I, I would've watched it. It's not, it's, I just didn't have the time and, and, and I can't watch back to back and stay until three in the morning or

Sidey: I can't

Cris: do

Dan: Just can't do it anymore, but maybe you can I would suggest you go and check this one out for yourself

Sidey: well, we've established earlier that this is one of the most irritating vocal sounds out there.

Reegs: My youngest.

Dan: the, sorry, just, I'm not talking about the, the hit song that opens it up because that is actually the best thing about

Reegs: It's not. I honestly, it makes me, my youngest is watching this a lot at the moment.

A lot. What's

Dan: the best thing about it then?

Reegs: I, you know, I usually am a person who likes to find good in art. I don't like to criticize or be overly negative. I think it's nice to be positive about the things you like and shut up about the things that you don't. But I just fucking hate this. Everything about it. Yeah. And listening to it is

It's like somebody performing ear surgery while you have a colonoscopy at the same time.

That's what it's like having it

Dan: hate

Reegs: I listen to music at home when the TV's on just so I don't have

to hear the voices

Dan: don't

Sidey: so there was a, a late eighties to early nineties original of this

Reegs: With

animation.

Dan: animation that didn't hurt your

Reegs: I think. It was like a 50s or 60s

Dan: it's it's

Sidey: it's the same voice cast as the eighties one doing

Reegs: Is it? Yeah. Alright.

Dan: Wow.

Sidey: So people of our age would probably remember the one from that first,

Reegs: I hated it then.

Sidey: Yeah. It's the, it's when you put a record on at the wrong speed and it's that sped up squeaky vocal sound.

Reegs: This is another thing I fucking despise about it because it takes some like popular song and basically barely remixes it and then just speeds it up.

Like you say, it's so talentless like to just feed this shit. So

Sidey: it's and in

Reegs: in this one there's a fucking Jamaican patua. It's like a, what's that guy, Sean Paul? It's a sort of push Sean Paul tune.

Sidey: Should we talk about how it looks? Cuz it's this is computer animated but it's that kind of very cheap looking. Yeah. Computer animation because they probably have this to churn. It's just a churn. You gotta get it out cheap. Um we we've all commented. The

Reegs: the character design is

Sidey: on the main guy who's Probably a paedophile, I think.

Dave, he has the most generic Prince Charming look about him. The square jaw.

Cris: The hair, the looks, the, yeah. It

Sidey: If you, if you did a mashup of every Disney Prince style

Cris: that's the

Dan: You've got Dave,

Sidey: A composite, I think, I'm trying to get at.

Reegs: believe that it's possible in this world, at least in the episode that we watched, that the chipmunks are hallucinations and Dave is just insane, like,

at

Dan: well, these,

Sidey: Well, I asked the question when we were watching it, like, What is the setup? Why has he got

Reegs: why has he got three sort of human

Dan: four

Cris: That's what I was, that was what confused me the most.

I couldn't care less where he got them. If he adopted them or they just came in his house or whatever, or he fed them.

Reegs: are they?

Cris: but yeah, is that is that an because he was a chipmunk. He has the tail. You can see the tail when they're skydiving.

Reegs: who says it's a chipmunk though? It's like, is it an alien?

Cris: but it looks like it's like it looks like a human that has a tail kind of morphing into a chipmunk or a chipmunk transgendering into a human.

Reegs: It's

Cris: not really

Reegs: like a bit of fur down the middle of its, it is. It's

Cris: very confusing. But, however, we don't have to debate this too long because, you

Sidey: Well the plot of this one is, because you picked out a particular episode for us, it's Alvin's Wild Weekend.

This

Reegs: Wild Weekend. Are we going to burst

Sidey: Are we gonna burst into flames at some point

Reegs: something

Dan: might yeah, we're having some light flickering here simon if you want to just turn the the knob

Reegs: knob. Okay, Daniel, I'll turn you.

Cris: the knob.

Dan: Turn the knob full power

Cris: Oh,

Dan: there you go a bit of ass crack there as well. We appreciate

Reegs: get. it's been

Sidey: the plot of this one is that Alvin feels like he's missing out on some one-to-one time with Dave.

So he.

Bullies him into going on this adventurous weekend where they get

Dan: he does all his chores for a month.

Sidey: for a month. Yeah. So he does do that, to be fair. He upholds his side of the

Dan: chores look, you know, he's got to clean the car, he's got to do

Cris: dishes, the cleaning Yeah, the wash up, yeah.

Dan: he's,

Reegs: Make the beds.

Sidey: then they go, they go skydiving, they go, Diving with great white sharks.

Cris: You know, they, they dive off cliffs, they, they dive into the water with the sharks.

Reegs: Well, we should say as well that, I mean, because Dave is very scared of all this stuff. Even in the

Dan: first Dave's not up for any of this, no. In fact, he

Reegs: Alvin like boots him out the plate, like kicks him

Dan: He, to be fair, Dave didn't even remember he should be doing something with Alvin when Alvin,

Sidey: Because he's not real.

Dan: he's working on his piano recital.

Isn't he? I think he's got a he's gonna be on stage. The, the dude may come and see him later. But he's insane. Insane. He's absolutely insane. He's talking to chipmunks.

Sidey: end up breaking the law, don't they?

Reegs: Well, just before that though, they stop at a carnival, right?

After they've done all of that wind tunnel stuff and all

Sidey: Yeah,

Reegs: cliff jumping and all that stuff. They stop at a carnival where Dave tries to win a prize by popping the balloons. And do you see the prize that he won?

Sidey: No,

Cris: Alvin.

Reegs: Alvin doll!

the

Sidey: same. So yeah, he's

Cris: a doll.

Reegs: lost his mind,

Sidey: he has,

Dan: But are they quite famous with the music? I remember when I was a

Sidey: I think they're supposed to be a famous

Dan: they're, they're supposed to be a famous band. So, you know, he, he may have chipmunk

Reegs: Fever.

Dan: fever around that fair.

Reegs: He's getting heated

Dan: because

I remember, yeah, when I was a kid, they were. They were in a band and you know, all the other chipmunks liked him but

Sidey: they're

Dan: fall asleep after an exciting day and While they were sleeping the back of their car. It gets towed away to a junk yard Alvin wakes up a little bit earlier than dave and goes to the junkyard office where he hears them watching television some mafia film and And he's confused and think they're talking about him as they say we got to get rid of the two idiots back there and

Reegs: they

Dan: automatically assume they're talking about you if they say two idiots so Then to be fair, so he's went waked up Dave and said, get the fuck out of Dodge here, Dave.

This is all kicking off. They're about the killers.

Dave buys it.

Reegs: Ironically starting now a police chase with people actually chasing them.

Dan: Yeah. And as soon as they hear the police car, Alvin knows that they're going to be in a car just like that. So keep going. And he makes him put his foot down.

Sidey: stamps his foot down on the accelerator. It's so fucking reckless. And they go hurtling off.

Reegs: They crash, they get arrested, they get Trump esque police mugshots, um

Sidey: was the, that was the continuity that I spoke to you about. Because in a previous episode it stated that Alvin is 12 inches tall.

Yet when he has his mugshot picture

Reegs: he was four foot!

Sidey: It shows that he's three and a half feet tall, which just cannot be. It cannot be. I

Reegs: think the idea of a four foot chipmunk is fucking horrifying

Dan: scary. It's quite scary.

Reegs: Anyway, they just get a warning from the police And then Dave Devastates Alvin in the car on the way home by saying that was the worst weekend

Dan: Well, I

Reegs: they just cut it there with Alvin

Sidey: Yeah, I

Dan: I think he says that was total

Sidey: Yeah.

Dan: bollocks.

You're boring. I'll never do

Reegs: We've all had those kind of holidays, to be fair, where you're coming back like, fuck me, that cost a fortune and it was shit. And then when he gets home, he sees the photos and realises Alvin is a bit less of a cunt than he thought

Dan: he

Sidey: only a little

Dan: he

Cris: I don't think so. I think he only realizes that he wasn't less of a cunt. He just realizes that Alvin had a good time, so he feels sorry for him. That doesn't excuse the fact that Alvin in this weekend did and only what he wanted, and he also

didn't even apologize for ending up in the police

Sidey: It's all, it's all kind of okay until somebody

Dan: care about Dave and probably a very selfish

lover as well.

Sidey: tears for you. Yeah,

Cris: I

flooded the man

Dan: all the time. I flooded the monkey. Really annoyed me. The animation voices. Yeah. I know. Even more than that though, it goes show

Sidey: The animation is that kind of generic awful

Dan: nothing to me. I will not watch any cartoons without animation.

Reegs: you did ten minutes of this. Imagine, your kid's into it, and they, but, you know, they want to watch TV, and that's on for an hour. Yeah,

Dan: Yeah.

Sidey: I'd have to get out of the room.

Reegs: Well, yeah, you can, but you can still hear it,

Sidey: know. So you probably know this rig, but what it is, it's simulating an anthology of a famous band and Dave, it's not Saville, it's Seville, is raising Platinum Recording Group, the Chipmunks, that's Alvin Simon and Theodore, and the Chippettes, which is Brittany, Jeanette, and Eleanor.

Yeah.

Reegs: The girl chipmunks.

Sidey: Yeah,

We didn't get to see them in

Dan: them. There was a flash through them in the intro.

That's, that's all you get. It's there. Yeah, yeah, for chipmunks they definitely were. But you saying his name's Dave Saville.

Sidey: Saville.

Just one vowel away from an amusing surname

Dan: Well this was

Reegs: awful

Everybody involved, I wish nothing but awful things on you, I'm sorry.

Sidey: I think everyone involved in this can do better things.

Dan: Yeah,

Reegs: a nicer way of putting it, but I, yeah, no,

Dan: could burn toast it'd be better than this wouldn't it

Cris: Yeah.

Sidey: Yeah

Strong recommend.

Dan: We'll get, next week we'll have some more choices.

Sidey: I've got choices if you want them.

Dan: you want them. Ooh, alright, go on then,

Sidey: on, I'm talking

Cris: You can tell us but also you need to put it in writing

Sidey: I will do, I will do.

Reegs: Although, right, it's it's a holiday here on Monday because the king is

Cris: over. Yes, yes, Charlie, Charlie boy.

Reegs: get to the man cave?

Will you have to share

Sidey: our friend, our friend is going to meet the king.

Cris: Yes,

Reegs: friend?

Cris: Swayze.

Reegs: Is he?

Dan: He's

Sidey: probably going to call him a cunt.

Dan: call him

Sidey: Because that's what he generally does to people.

Cris: Yes, he is. He is a friend of the podcast. He has a salt business over here in Jersey, and he's been chosen by genuine jersey to discuss

Sidey: salt.

Cris: salt with the king.

Sidey: could tell King Charles about our podcast episode about salt.

Wouldn't that be, wouldn't that be something?

Dan: Ah,

Reegs: He's probably heard it already I

Dan: I'd

Sidey: Yeah, probably. Do you want the

Reegs: Yeah, Please

Cris: Do Yes. Yeah,

Sidey: Pretty much this is going to give the game away. It's turtle week.

Reegs: game out.

Sidey: so we've got top five amphibians. The red turtle

Reegs: Red Turtle. 2016

Sidey: animated

Dan: Ghibli one.

Sidey: And then we've got, I think this might be Michael Bay, is it?

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Out of the Shadows, also from 2016. So one of those is a mid week and one's a May feature. And then we've got Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles,

Reegs: Ninja Turtles.

Cris: Newton Ninja.

Sidey: that's the X rated one. Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, Series 1, Episode 25 is the kids.

Reegs: That sounds

Dan: absolutely

Reegs: I think it was

Sidey: it was the highest rated episodes.

Reegs: rated

Sidey: It might even be a series finale.

Reegs: Finale.

Sidey: So,

yeah, turtle week. Look forward to that.

Cris: Okay,

Dan: forward to that.

Sidey: I think the film has Megan Fox in it as April O'Neil.

Cris: Potentially It

could be one of the Turtle ninjas in the Euros final as

Reegs: Yeah,

Dan: Yes, Yeah.

and the red turtle is

Sidey: Rafael.

Dan: Is the is it studio ghibli one or there's something like that or?

Sidey: know. I think it just looks like

looks like that kind of

Cris: Is that, is that about the turtle ninjas as well or is

Sidey: No, it's just a

Reegs: animated movie.

Yeah,

Sidey: I think it's more of a spiritual

Dan: Spiritual awakening. So,

Sidey: can wait to it though.

Dan: Let's have a spiritual awakening

Sidey: next week. All that remains is to say signing out.

Reegs: Reeds has left the building. a

Cris: that

Dan: love that Riggs. Dan's gone.