Moana & Bergerac

Moana

Reegs: Welcome to Bad Dads Film Review and without the usual preparation this week, it's going to be an improvised intro, we'll see where we go with things. And that is a bit of a shame because this week's episode is island themed and that is something that we all have a bit of experience about.

First up, we're going to be chatting top five islands, I think. And after that we're following up With the not your average Disney princess movie, Moana. We've all professed our love for that movie endlessly on this pod already, so we're gonna celebrate

Dan: for me because I hadn't seen it

Sidey: never seen it,

Reegs: Oh, right, okay, Dan had never seen it.

Well, we'll see what you think, then.

Dan: Yeah

Reegs: And finishing up of course, it was on when we were kids, so it sort of counts in the kids TV

Sidey: I definitely watched it as a child.

Reegs: Yeah, it's Bergerac a program which literally everybody in Jersey was on, or knew somebody was on at some point, as we'll no doubt find out later when we recount the stories of John Nettles and his, um Yes. with an improvised intro, that means we don't have so many jokes for people, so it's just Dan being old Pete, who was outraced up a mountain by a five year old this week. Six. A six year old. And the enigma that is Sidey, and then there's me, Reegs.

Hello. Hi

Sidey: Hello.

Dan: Hello.

Hi

Pete: guys.

Dan: I

Sidey: I know that we did a Top 5 last week,

Reegs: And I'm

Sidey: and I'm almost certain that we had

Pete: was Favourite Episodes, wasn't it?

Sidey: No, that was before it was Cash Money last week.

Pete: was it?

Dan: Money?

Sidey: Yeah, and we had nominations from as far as Australia.

Yes.

Reegs: we had a really good one, didn't we?

Sidey: she wanted to nominate Heath Ledger in two hands. He has to deliver 10, 000 tickets. Australian dollars, so what's that?

Dan: 18

Reegs: quid.

Pete: yeah, yeah.

about what I just spent in the shop on like

sweets and

Sidey: dollars to the pound is what the the barmy army is to say He stops at bondi beach and can't resist having a swim on a stinking hot day So buries the envelope in the sand only to have it stolen and thunderbirds of gochat.

Mel also wanted to touch base about that because she visited the wetter

Reegs: Weta, yeah, the Weta Studios.

She, she saw, she saw the physical sets that we were talking about, didn't she? Yeah. So.

Sidey: Darren Lety was talking about the Lady Killers,

Dan: Killers.

Reegs: movie, I think.

Sidey: favorite movie. Yeah. Or certainly in his top five.

Dan: I'm, I'm gonna hazard a guess and say that he's going for the original

Sidey: Everyone would go for the original. Of course. Yeah. Even though that's, that's a Cohen Brothers film.

Dan: Yeah, I know.

Sidey: It's an absolute Turkey. They make offer 60 grand at 1955 adjusted for inflation price. And.

Reegs: there

are others as well, but I think we've got to put Mel's in because I mean that's she's from Australia and that is an

Dan: that've taken ages to get here.

Sidey: in. Well, Darren Lethe did also put in Bottom, which I know Pete and I are big fans of.

Dan: a bit of bottom.

Sidey: which was to do with counterfeiting. And then,

Reegs: He might be Irish as well and that's all I that's

Pete: it's an island because it's ireland

Reegs: Yeah

Sidey: But I think you're right. Thunderbirds. They're not Thunderbirds. Heath Ledger. Yeah. That sort of connection. Yeah.

Reegs: What your missus doesn't need Pete.

Dan: doesn't

Sidey: Well, they're probably milled there. Stuff that we watched this week.

Reegs: Mmm.

Dan: a bit of the

Reegs: haven't even seen The Little Stonk.

Dan: we watched this week. Cable cash financial fraud, but it's dramatized as a bit romance kind of stuck in there But there's twists and I enjoyed it It was it's stuck a little bit towards the end, but I enjoyed this kind of thing and it was the best foreign Movie series thing that I've seen since the playlist which was also recommended.

We talked about that in this other pod

Sidey: Yeah

Dan: We did that you didn't do

Sidey: which will come out after this

Dan: Pete you got anything to

Pete: have I been

Dan: you got to speak because that's how podcasts work. No, it's fair enough

Pete: I, what have I been watching? I've been re watching, as I think you may have alluded to on another pod that's not going to be coming out yet, that I've started re watching Game of Thrones again for like the eighth time or

Sidey: something

How far are you into it?

Pete: Episode, season five, episode four.

Sidey: Blimey,

you've rattled through

Pete: I've absolutely like tanked through it. Yeah. Just basically had it on all day at work

Sidey: Has Aya killed Walder Frey yet?

Pete: No, no, no, no, that's sick. That's Seven maybe she's only just got to the the house of black and white.

Sidey: Oh, okay.

Pete: So we're there She's just got to bravos some stuff's happening.

She's like sansa's just about to get carted off to marry round to meet ramsay so yeah, there's still loads of

Dan: hideousness. That'll end well.

Pete: Yeah, there's no point, there's too many like high moments and absolute brilliance to go through. What I have also been watching is the first three episodes of the second season of The Rings of Power.

The Lord of the Rings I really like it. I'm, I'm into it. It's dark and it's, it's, it's very involved in sort of the convoluted convoluted kind of storyline and so on. But it's, I, I really like it. But, you were a bit on the fence after the first season right, aside?

You

Sidey: Just it was a big letdown. It's hard to get fully invested in a prequel story when you know who's gonna be there afterwards.

Pete: Yeah, but I, I found it sort of, it got better. I re watched the first season and it was a, it was better the second time around and it, it left me, it, it whetted my appetite for the second season. Have you got into that, Reegs?

Reegs: No man, it sounds fucking horrendous to be honest.

Pete: You look like this, you literally look like the archetypal Lord of the Rings, like,

Reegs: fanboy.

I hate, I hate, what, because I've got a beard?

Yeah but,

Pete: was going to say something about Hobbits then, I'm not going to, I'm not. I was literally

Reegs: like a hobbit? Yeah, fair enough. Yeah, no, people are always mystified, but it's not really, for me, that

Sidey: you don't really do

Pete: It's a bit above your head, isn't it? Too high brow for you.

Reegs: Trolls and fucking orcs and

Sidey: did like game of thrones though.

Reegs: I did, but I liked the way that gradually introduced, like, magic into the story, apart from, like, an upfront thing, then magic fucks off for a whole season as,

Pete: Until you get dragons at the end, yeah.

Dan: Did you ever read the books,

Pete: Yeah, yeah,

Dan: either of those, Game of Thrones and

Pete: I've read I've read three of the Game of Thrones books and obviously all of the Lord of the Rings and Hobbit stuff

Dan: Which

Sidey: read Summerillion and all that?

Pete: No, I tried getting on with the Silmarillion, but it was all a bit yeah

Reegs: Tolkien? I can't. I tried reading it.

It's fucking

Pete: it's

Dan: so I've watched

Reegs: Nah.

Pete: it's just amazing.

Reegs: Not a lot this week, I'm afraid. I'm not really afraid, because it's nothing to be afraid of. It's quite, yeah, we're in a nice atmosphere and all that,

so, yeah.

Sidey: I've watched, I've watched a few things. I've watched Moana twice.

Reegs: watched Six Days, Seven Nights that you lot

watched. It's like a really solid vehicle for Harrison Ford. Like a kind of six out of 10 movie.

Sidey: Yeah, I think we gave it a five.

Reegs: yeah,

Dan: Five and a half, yeah. No, but

Reegs: average.

Dan: Great message.

Reegs: not

Dan: No. It gives, it

Pete: it it gives Dan hope that's what he likes about it 55 he can still be doing at least two hot 27 20 somethings

Sidey: I watched, yeah, Moana a couple of times. Oh, I've started watching The Last Dance again.

Dan: Pete, you

Sidey: you probably will refuse to watch it because it's about

Dan: watch it because it's about basketball. Basketball? Basketball's just what

Sidey: Basketball's just

Pete: So

Dan: can't tell

Pete: have, can't tell you how little interest I've got in

Dan: got

Sidey: although it is

Dan: basketball. It's about

Sidey: seen it?

Pete: it? No!

Dan: then I'm not

Sidey: a documentary about

Pete: well, then I'm not watching it.

Dan: You were a hundred percent.

Pete: this is Pong documentary. Why didn't you watch that?

Dan: Where, which channel? Which channel? Tell me I'm all over Petton. Damn Liz. I'm good at Petton Pete, actually. Oh, are you? Yeah. Play

Pete: Yeah. You

would

Dan: Balls. I watched

Sidey: that, I watched there were some films I watched.

I finished the Batman and I did some other things. I can't remember what they were though. I'm sure they were good, they're pretty good.

Pete: things.

I

Sidey: And I've been putting off watching Rings of Power because, yeah, like I say, I wasn't mega into the

Pete: pretty good movie. And I've been putting off watching, like, Howard, because, yeah, like I say, negative stuff. Um,

Sidey: No, I probably won't. Okay. should we just crack on with the top five?

Reegs: Yeah.

Sidey: 5 islands,

As discussed previously, we would say Arlands

Reegs: Ireland.

Ireland.

Dan: auf. Got any

Sidey: Well, I've got I've got songs, I've got video games. I've got

Dan: You've come well prepared And I am almost the opposite of that

Reegs: Yeah, me too, I'm afraid.

Dan: Oh, yeah, but i'm thinking of winging it. I'm just gonna go on on a wing and a prayer

Reegs: how is that different to any other week for you?

But for me, I know, I know it sounds

Dan: I'm admitting it

Reegs: amounts of research for this talk. Stupid shit.

Dan: Well, okay.

Pete: want to start or would you like us

Dan: I'm gonna, I'm gonna go with an absolute cracker, actually, Pete. I'm gonna start off with the islands from Gulliver's Travels. It's a fictional island

Pete: more than one.

There's

Dan: More than one, there's three.

Reegs: adaptation of this.

Dan: Well I like the Ted Danson one. Do you ever see that? Gulliver's Travels, Ted

Sidey: Yeah, I remember that one. It's like a Christmas

Dan: Yeah, it's kind of, yeah, and the little world where all these little people, you know, wakes up on the, on the sea and they tie him and move him and the Lilliputians.

So that would be my island. I, I like

Sidey: But there's more, there's more than one, isn't there? There's not

Dan: yeah. No, I haven't got anything else. So I was going to mention the other islands when it came back around next time.

Pete: went to

Sidey: went to other ones where they're different. So there was the, the Lilliputians do with the tidy ones.

And then it goes to other

Pete: and

Reegs: a place where he's really small,

Pete: ha. I there was a Ted Danson one. I've not seen it. The only one I've seen, I think, I've read the books when I was younger.

But I the only one I've seen is the Jack Black

Reegs: Jack Black, yeah, it's terrible,

Pete: it is terrible, but I watched it with one of my sons and he enjoyed it because I knew it was dopey and silly because he'd seen Jack Black in something else and it wasn't School of Rock, but he'd seen him in something else.

Thought he

Sidey: Jim Ongie.

Pete: and was and I said, Oh yeah, let's watch this film and he stuck with it. It was all right.

Sidey: I think they're trying to cancel him now, aren't

they?

Reegs: Yeah.

Pete: you what for now

Sidey: He was on stage when his mate

Reegs: Kyle Glass, is that his

Sidey: Yeah, said Trump should have been killed.

Reegs: Trump being assassinated.

Sidey: And so he had to kind of go, whoa, not cool guys.

And everyone's like, well, you're a cunt. And you haven't

Pete: well, you're

Sidey: know.

guilty.

Reegs: Cause your mate said something a bit stupid.

Pete: know.

We're all in a, we're all bang in trouble, yeah. Yeah, who's up?

Sidey: Reegs

Reegs: think. Oh, is it? Well.

Pete: Riggs.

Sidey: Oh, did you not go? I know you're talking about, we were talking about Gulliver, weren't we?

Yeah, go on then.

Yeah.

Pete: only because last time I was here, we seem to be doing double bills a lot.

I'm going to go for a double bill. And this was like, cause some of these are fictitious islands and some are. The opposite of fictitious islands, fact, fact

Dan: Donald Duck and Daffy Duck

Pete: and no one, no one responds to that. Mine are two real life prison islands, you can probably guess what one of those is, it is Alcatraz.

From films such as escape from Alcatraz and of course the rock, which we reviewed on this pod, which was,

Dan: love, I love it when we can just drop in Sean's voice now and

Pete: Yeah. Welcome to the rock. And of course, Womack, you little shit. And then of course the other real life prison Island is Azkaban prison. From the, which was in the documentary, Harry Potter.

And all of the, the, the worst wizards and witches of the wizarding

Sidey: sometimes

Dan: were where

Sidey: were there, sometimes innocent, like,

Pete: Yeah, like Sirius Black, Hagrid, didn't did, did, mate, did what's his name, Dumbledore go, do a little stint there at some point? I think he might have. I think the irony is, I don't think you think, you see the prison in The Prisoner of Azkaban.

Like, you don't see the prison itself, but you do in, definitely in The Order of the

Sidey: When they

Pete: When they all bust out,

Sidey: she breaks

Pete: yeah. Beat

Sidey: yeah. The Yeah. What a saga that is,

Reegs: Oh, it's very nerd heavy this week.

Pete: That's, it's incredible, mate. You should watch great documentaries. Brilliant. Watch them Riggs.

Reegs: Yeah, well, most of us have lived in Jersey for a decent chunk of our lives here. Yeah, all of us. And I think we all know that one of the great perks of living on an island and people who live on an island will know this is that you can sleep with your cousin.

Yeah. Yeah. And so the blue lagoon

Dan: long as they're the same sex.

The

Reegs: the movie I was thinking of Brooke Shields. Yeah. I think she was only 14 when this movie was

Sidey: horny, isn't it?

Reegs: I think it's probably illegal, isn't it? But that, I

Sidey: was it. Epstein Island?

Pete: Island? Yeah, Ed Sheeran

Reegs: Yeah. That was, she got marooned as a baby or whatever, like a toddler was with her cousin on an island.

And that was the story. It was some, I think it was some artsy fartsy, like genuinely, you know, not pervy novel or pervy, but like not,

Sidey: Bit in an arty way.

Reegs: yeah, exactly in an acceptable way. But then it was just throwing 14 year olds on the screen and, but it had somebody like or somebody in it. It's like.

To give it some kind of credibility.

Yeah, Blue Lagoon. And then it spawned a load of sequels as well. Yeah, it

Pete: Return to the Blue lagoon.

Reegs: Yeah, exactly. It had like Mia Jovovich was in one and Denise Richards, I think, was in another. So,

Sidey: It was the Red Lagoon at one point, wasn't it? Because she gets her period on the island.

Reegs: island. Well, she

Dan: she gets pregnant on the island. She

Reegs: She does get pregnant. Yeah,

Sidey: Hmm, cool.

Creature

Pete: from the Blue Lagoon?

Reegs: Yeah.

That's more lany though, isn't it?

Pete: yeah, yeah.

Sidey: How about Dolly Parton and Kenny Rogers

Dan: Island

in the sun?

Sidey: Islands? In the

Reegs: Yes,

Dan: Oh, right, right, I

Reegs: I've got that. Yeah.

Dan: in the

Sidey: I mean, name one thing mankind's ever done. That's better. You can't

Because it's that good.

Pete: it's that good. Islands

Reegs: the

sun. Oh. Have you done it at karaoke? It's like, it's, it's a karaoke tune

Dan: Weezer did Island in the Sun.

Sidey: Yeah, they did. Kenny Rogers is like the ultimate sex symbol as well. It's just so, so buff.

Reegs: buff. Didn't you have the sleeve with him here where he's got his shirt unbuttoned down to basically is like where his pubes

Sidey: They

also, it's not relevant to the islandness of this, but they, those two, Dolly and Kenny have a Christmas album, which is definitely, definitely worth checking out at a specific point in the year.

Reegs: There was actually a movie that I've never seen called Islands in the Stream. I did see this earlier when I looked it up

because

Sidey: looked it up wanted

Reegs: other by. make a

Pete: Doesn't make a lot of sense.

Dan: No. Um,

Reegs: It's the water is, is they're around them. They're in the same ecosystem. But they're they're apart.

Dan: the Gulf Stream, maybe?

Pete: Yeah, like islands

Dan: that would make

Reegs: They're apart, but they're kind of apart, but together in the flow of things.

That's what the song of the story, that's the

Pete: by definition,

Dan: it was on a, on a river, and

Reegs: the same

Dan: get very close.

Pete: let's move on. Daniel,

Sidey: But I've got another musical one.

It's I am a rock, I am an island.

Pete: Oh yeah,

Sidey: Simon and, Cylon and Garfunkel. Cylon and

Pete: Parsley, sage, rosemary and thyme.

Dan: Well, I'm gonna go for the classic Robinson Crusoe Island. We've had a few different Kind of iterations of this the Tom Hanks one where it was kind of the same thing, wasn't

Reegs: thing, wasn't it?

Castaway.

Dan: Away, but he's playing a modern day Robinson Crusoe. He's even got, you know,

Reegs: There was also an Oliver Reed movie called Castaway with Amanda Donahoe in, where he'd like, pay some women to come to the island and get drunk with him.

Dan: Wow, that, well, that

Sidey: Was that a documentary

Reegs: it is. Yeah,

Pete: that I've

Dan: the one, the one that I, yeah, the one that I watched, it was just him on his own, like, you know, he didn't, he didn't get a phone call to call some chicks or anything. And it's that, that classic, you know, shipwrecked island. It doesn't really have a name. He's just found Robinson after a a big night out on the booze, on a booze, booze?

Pete: Cruise.

Dan: Yeah, it's a booze cruise. I think he was out on that. You know how they can end and and

Sidey: I went on a booze cruise here in Jersey, not in the man cave, in Jersey, and we saw a dead body.

Dan: Wow.

Pete: I heard about that. I

Dan: Like human.

Pete: know

Sidey: A human dead body. Yeah. Some guy just some was sunbathing on the rocks and fell off and

Dan: It makes you.

Sidey: And we were literally just going along on the booze cruise and someone's like, That's a fucking dead body. Like literally we got boarded by the police and had to give statements and all that sort of stuff.

Yeah, he was still dead. There was nothing we could do

Dan: It's, it takes the the edge off a booze cruise though, a little bit, doesn't it?

Sidey: It didn't bother me at all. I was just like, let's crack on.

Pete: it makes it better than a

Sidey: a normal movie. Yeah. I mean, he's dead. So what do you want me to do? I didn't kill him.

So let's just crack on.

Dan: a wake,

Sidey: Yeah, exactly.

Dan: Yeah.

Pete: this will either be a quick one or a short one. I am a massive fan of this film. I really, really, really liked it and have watched it numerous times. And I know there's a lot of hate in the room for it.

And I still don't really understand why.

Sidey: Shutter Island?

Pete: Fucking

loved it. Like, really, really loved it. I know, I know that it's quite sort of preposterous with the anagram names and stuff like that. But

Sidey: I

yeah, I was, I was thinking about it today and I was thinking I should probably re watch it and re appraise it because I have such a hatred for it that maybe that's not

Pete: for it. But maybe that's unfair.

And then like, just, I guess, took it on face value and was like, really like just blown away by it.

I thought it was brilliant. I love the sort of like the darkness and the sort of, you know, the mood is, is tense without anything really like horrific sort of happening. Obviously there's some, you know, children drowning and stuff like that, but there's, yeah, it, it, it was just a, a really dark, made me feel uncomfortable all the way through and I was, yeah, on, on the edge of my seat throughout.

And, and I didn't mind the, the twist and I, and it's, and I, it, it really got me at the end where you, the realization that he actually knows what he is, what he's done and everything, but wants to, you know, but just pretends so that he can go and get lobotomized. That's so that's a spoiler for everyone if they haven't seen it.

You, you're, you're judging me. That's a really judgy look, Reeves. You hated it, didn't you?

Reegs: No.

Pete: You didn't like it either.

It

Reegs: It was, it was alright.

Pete: Dan, how did you feel about it?

Dan: stutter island loved it pete one of the best i've seen

Pete: Excellent. Let's move on That's you Riggs.

Reegs: Well, last year when I did my shoulder in, I watched a bunch of like four hour movies and one of them was Avatar way of water. And that's got like two different kinds of islands, got like floating islands in the sky as well as like in the sequel, it

Dan: an island in the

Reegs: tropical

Pete: Yep. Yep.

Reegs: islands as they

Dan: you're not really a fantasy man, are you? I

Reegs: No, no, that was okay. That was like the painkillers I was on at the time were

Pete: like the

Reegs: it was just like those, you're supposed to just sit on the sofa for hours at a

Pete: It was just, you know, you're supposed to just sit on the sofa for hours.

Yeah, yeah,

Reegs: yeah. No, it's a good looking movie. I do remember that.

So yeah, then there was the island. Michael Bay.

Sidey: that and McGregor

Reegs: and Scarlett Johansson,

Sidey: Yeah, that's the closest I've ever got to walking out of a film at the cinema. It was fucking dreadful. Is that the dead guy?

Reegs: Yeah, the car crash. The stunt guy died in it and

Sidey: it. Used

Reegs: used the footage, yeah.

So yeah, the island. It wasn't very much like island life as far as I'm concerned, really, that

Sidey: Million miles away, but maybe

a bit exaggerated.

There's also the island from lost. that brilliant premise that went fucking nowhere.

They clearly didn't know what they're doing.

I have let's see. The island of dr. Moreau. Yes. So I don't know if you've read the comics because this is a movie.

Alan Moore. There's, there's a few of them. So it's, it starts, well, he, it's from the League of Extraordinary Gentlemen.

And the third story of that is takes place on the island of Dr. Moreau. So it like crosses over with it. And then famously, I think the Moreau is Val Kilmer and Marlon Brando, supposed to be like, like one of the biggest car crashes of all time, which I. Constantly think about nominating and I thought about it for this week But then like we did cats we've done other ones that we know about and it's never funny Like it's not as funny as you think it's going to be.

It's just bad. Like bad things are just bad and it's hard to Hard to even sit through them. So I put that off probably forever

Yeah

I

think this was mine brando's last thing before he died and it was like like excruciatingly

probably one to avoid

Dan: a long long time ago and I've I've thought a couple Maybe it should be a midweek the mosquito coast and we

Sidey: Harrison?

Dan: Yeah, we talked about harrison.

Have you ever seen this pete? It's yeah a long time ago. So, It's set in like massachusetts and he's an inventor. But not having a great life there. Things are hectic It's like And he just upsticks and goes, We're all fucking off, family. River Phoenix is in it as his son. And they go off to, like, Honduras, along the Mosquito Coast, onto one of the little islands there, where these people are.

Sidey: Is there loads of mosquitoes there?

Dan: There's well,

Sidey: Because I'm out. If there is, I'm not

Pete: I'm

guessing that there's a

Dan: there's, there are, there, there are a few I would imagine it's Honduras and he heads out there and tries to make a life out there and show the natives what ice is and things like this, so, It was a really good one actually, but it wasn't He was a big star.

I think after indiana jones or it was in and around this time So you were just kind of watching it I was probably young when I watched his first time around where I hope a second viewing might Might hold that that good memory. I had for a bit anyway

Pete: But you didn't watch it again

Dan: I haven't seen it again. No

Pete: and River Phoenix famously played him as a younger version of him in the third

Sidey: one. Yes,

Pete: that yeah. Okay a couple of Asian islands

Dan: Okay.

Pete: One of them is called Xiong Apto

Would anyone care to guess what that's from?

Dan: Vietnam? Xiong

Pete: it is from the television series squid game

Sidey: was apparently,

Pete: that island and there was apparently there was a thing on the internet? Yeah, South Korean and there was a thing on the internet where people were trying to guess they never named the island in the in the series and people trying to guess what it was and it went round and round in circles and it was a big thing in South Korea, we didn't give a shit about it And I thought it was worth mentioning because there's a second season of Squid Game coming out.

Boxing Day, I think, is

Reegs: really really capitalizing on the success of the first one, which was a bajillion years ago and everybody's forgotten about

Sidey: yeah

Pete: but I like that series.

Reegs: It was really good at the time.

Yeah,

Pete: and I think the second series I've got high hopes for. The other one is a real island as well. It's Hashima Island. Which is the abandoned former mining island that is featured in Skyfall in the James Bond film. You know, it's, you know, they go, they go there and what's his name, Javier Bardem's character, Silva or whatever, is set up base there.

And Bond has to travel over there and it's, it's, but that's literally what it's like. Few sort of less fallen statues and stuff, but like those buildings are in total, but you're allowed to go there on tours but you essentially have to sign up as if you're going to like a Like a heavy industrial tour or something and sign loads of disclaimers because the island literally could just collapse on you Whilst you're walking around it's quite interesting.

I mean, there's tons of islands in james

Reegs: Yeah, I was gonna say

Pete: but i'm not going to go through all of them.

Reegs: island layers

Pete: bond island

Reegs: all bases and layers

Pete: Yeah. All, all the Right the way

Reegs: austin powers was the the same sort of deal with his volcano island

thing

Sidey: San Monique is the fictional island where Live and Let Die is set.

Reegs: Oh,

Pete: one.

Oh,

Dan: beach as well. You know, Leonal, the DiCaprio along those same stretch of waters.

Pete: Yes, indeed. On co pp.

Reegs: We're all enormous fans of the Alvin and the Chipmunks franchise. And you'll remember, of course, after the first movie, the second movie, which was the Squeakquel, I think and then the third movie is

Pete: watched all these?

Reegs: Yeah, with the kids. Why? Chipwrecked. Remember

Pete: Chipwrecked.

Sidey: No, I don't remember it, no.

Reegs: A God awful story of the chipmunks being stranded on an island. I think by this point, what's his name? My name is Earl Jason Lee.

Pete: Yep, that's him.

Sidey: him. I

Reegs: think he's bowed out now and been replaced by some, you know, some, somebody else. Yeah, exactly.

Jurassic Park has a bit of island content. It's Isla Nubar, I think is where it all starts.

Pete: yep.

Reegs: Some other names of islands as well that are involved in that. It's big island stuff.

Yeah, you

Pete: find out retrospectively that they'd actually built loads of

islands

Reegs: a backup island and then a

Pete: they only told you about one at a time, yeah.

Sidey: Sauna.

Reegs: Isla Sauna, that's it, yeah.

Pete: Okay.

Reegs: So yeah. that,

Sidey: Scab Island is one of the islands in the Monkey Island video game series. It's a pirate infested island that

Reegs: that's good.

Sidey: that? It was like

Reegs: monkey island. Yeah.

Sidey: click game. You had to

Dan: Oh,

Reegs: Yeah. Monkey Island

Dan: yeah. Puzzle

game, kind of

Reegs: It's a Lucas Arts, I

Sidey: Yeah, you had to get that that would enable you to then unlock that to then

Dan: Yeah.

Sidey: and blah blah blah.

It was really fun. Fucking frustrating at

Dan: I think I will add it on a Commodore 64

Sidey: think I had it on an amiga 500 or something like that. i'm sure I had another video game on well Zelda i've got a million hours invested into zelda tears of the kingdom that has loads of floating islands like you were talking about rigs and then a TV series.

Father Ted. Remember that? Where

Pete: Craggy

Sidey: craggy Island. Craggy Island, yeah. Great series. That one. Really good. And did you know that Thomas and Friends is set on an island?

Pete: it is. The island of Sodor. Yeah. Yeah. I knew all about that.

Sidey: There you go. Next one will be my

Reegs: my

Dan: Well, I'll mention Innis Men, of course on an island.

Ah. Cornish horror that we'd watched and reviewed for the pod. And then I will make my nomination when we swing round again.

Pete: Okay. I'll just finish off my list then without going into any great detail about any I've got. I wanna say it just, 'cause I've been watching Game with Thrones, the Island of Nth. You never see it but me. Sande is from there. You know, the well say the interpreter and she smokes. The Nightmare of Milky Joe

is a Brilliant, brilliant

Reegs: It's one of

Pete: of the Mighty BI dunno what, I don't think they, it is just a sort of an aol, isn't it?

Yeah, but

Sidey: Right, so there's I'll probably have to edit this out, but there's a bird at work and I can't fucking stand her.

And last week she just started turning up with like really bad

Reegs: Hahahahahaha So like,

I literally am on the couch

Sidey: And it's the coconut that they dress up as a woman.

Reegs: Yeah, yeah. What's her name? Howard.

Sidey: The nightmare of milk joe. I just like

Pete: because they start getting like jealous of each other's like coconut girlfriends and stuff. It's fucking, it's, it's absolutely brilliant. Fantasy Island, which is, 70s, late

Reegs: They made two terrible Blumhouse movies of those as well, which I've seen both of those.

Pete: any of those. I want to mention Isla de Muerta, which features heavily in the plot of the Curse of the Black Pearl, the first Pirates of the Caribbean film, just to troll you guys.

Skull Island, obviously King Kong. Tracy Island. We were talking about the Thunderbirds before. Whatever the island the Swiss family Robinson go on is quite funny because loads of animals

Sidey: torture torch around animal island

Pete: Yeah, and I'll do my nom.

Reegs: I'll probably go straight to my nom which is going to be, I don't know if you remember this, but there was a TV series that was briefly set in the Channel Islands in 1996 called Island. And it starred Matthew Marsden the famous anti vaxxer and right wing US fucking shill now.

But I was very briefly in it.

Dan: Oh

my

Reegs: Only,

only as an extra,

Dan: Wow, we

Reegs: I don't know if it's on the, there's a scene at cafe where, so if 17 year old

Dan: Matthew, if you're listening. It's

Reegs: very slightly across the

Pete: I need to see what a 17 year old Reegs, 17 year old Reegs look like.

Reegs: I had ridiculous, yeah, it was,

Dan: 17?

You were quite old.

Reegs: 18, yeah, 96.

Dan: like I thought you'd be like six or seven. Okay, that would be

Pete: Yeah, we need to find this

Dan: rare footage indeed.

Pete: so you're nominating yourself. That's a little bit of a

Reegs: brag. Yeah, yeah.

Pete: Yeah. Yeah

Reegs: was

Dan: all about

Reegs: It got completely canned. The actor was a gut, like a total douchebag it turns out. And also, Right, being an extra fucking sucks because the pay shit that hours along and somebody said a really horribly anti semitic thing like within my earshot and I never like challenged him on it.

I mean, it wasn't in my conversation, but it's like one of those things like just fucking burns that you didn't fucking say something like,

Pete: yeah,

Dan: Still

Pete: Or you

Reegs: so that's what, yeah, that's what I should have done. Yeah, so,

Sidey: Well i'm going for cortez island from spy kids to the island of lost dreams

Reegs: Yeah, of course.

Sidey: Yeah.

Dan, very

Dan: Okay, well, I'm going for Lord of the Flies, the 1963 version with Peter Brook, the, the director, and it was about the schoolboys being marooned on this Pacific Island and survival.

I remember watching this, the black and white version one when I was a kid and just being transfixed by the absolute carnage of, of it all and how it panned out.

Pete: never seen any film about it, the film adaptation of it. I've only read the

Dan: That's the one. That's the one. The watch is

Reegs: There was a TV series I

Dan: Yeah, there is TV series on it as well.

Pete: would like to. Mine

Reegs: fat kid gets battered.

Pete: Piggy. Yeah,

Dan: Yeah. It's William Golden, isn't it? the author

Reegs: it

Pete: Oh, is it great knowledge? So mine is I've said this before on the pod a load of times comfortably, if not the best movie of all time, definitely the best Muppets movie of all time is Muppets Treasure Island. I love this film. I've watched it a gazillion times. I'd love to nominate it one day. But again, again, you've already done it.

Reegs: we've never done

Sidey: We're a Muppet free zone.

Reegs: Yeah.

then,

and I absolutely love the Muppets.

Pete: so have you seen Muppet's Treasure Island?

Reegs: Not for a very long

Sidey: I haven't, I

Pete: a treat. Yeah,

Reegs: I don't have the same

fondness for it. Christmas Carol.

Yeah, exactly. I got like, I love that one. And the Muppet movie and, all

Pete: So, yeah, that's my nom.

Sidey: Is it one of the Jason Segel ones?

Pete: No, no, no. This is it's Tim Curry's the main lead. It's got like Jennifer Saunders and like Billy Connolly like, you know, this and loads of Muppets.

Sidey: Right. Okay. Yeah. Well we should do that F

Pete: Fozzie Bear. Yeah.

Sidey: Do you want some noms from online?

Yeah, because we've had some, they're all from Dan Letic. I only put it on this afternoon. And we've got Ennis men. Yeah. Already

Dan: mentioned. Good shout.

Sidey: the rock and Escape from Raz. Yeah. The incredible. Syndrome's HQ is on an island, and Grabbers, a remote Irish island fights for survival against alien invaders who are allergic to booze.

then a whole subset about Iceland. Women at War, great film about an eco activist destroying electricity pylons to disrupt an aluminium plant. Rams, frosty relationship

Dan: Oh, Rams, that's good that. Have you seen that?

Oh, that is good.

Sidey: Okay, and the deep fisherman swept overboard somehow survives in the cold Atlantic Ocean.

Crumbs. So

Dan: I like the sound of that last one, but Rams I've seen and it's, it's,

Sidey: decent, is

Dan: yeah, it's surprisingly good.

Sidey: Okay, cool. So, well, maybe one of those, or maybe something else, if anyone else is willing to submit between now and next week.

Reegs: We'll find out.

Sidey: Right, we're going to talk about Moana.

Pete: way,

Sidey: And We know that we're

fans of it. At least 75 percent of us in this room have seen it before. Multiple times, I would say.

Pete: Yep.

Reegs: Yep.

Sidey: There is a very real risk that we'll just drill down into every bit of minute plot detail. So we need to try and keep it skipping along. It starts.

Dan: Well, I watched it for the first time

Sidey: yeah, it's your Moana

Dan: Yeah, so i'm interested to um

Sidey: But it, but it starts with a bit of storytelling, doesn't it? How these stories are passed down from generation to generation.

It's Moana's grandmother is telling, but we don't see her at first. It's, it's, it's, it's shown as stuff that's happening really, you know, for real about monsters and what have you. And then as it is, it revealed the story that we are listening to someone. passing on these stories to the, to the grandchildren.

And then it's, there's these kind of woven tapestries and she spills ink on it to show what's happening and, and all that. And then the story is that, Te

Reegs: Yeah,

Sidey: this I guess like Gaia or other equivalent like thing island and someone has taken the heart of it this magical stone thing

Dan: Green stone.

Sidey: Gifts the power of creation has been taken by maui demigod

Reegs: Yeah. And he's a shape-shifting kind of. You see him as part of this, I think, don't you? You see him Yeah. Shape shifting through all of his various incarnations to, to

Dan: shape shifting through all of his various incarnations to, to break the shackles. And he's going to be

Sidey: And the animation, I

Reegs: And the animation, I think, considering this is a 2016 movie, the animation, I think, still holds up fairly

strongly.

Dan: Animation is amazing

Reegs: it's really dynamic and very colourful

Dan: Eight years old, nine years old, wow.

Sidey: And they, they established the relationships in this bit dead early on. So the grandmother is this kind of maverick. She's just like telling the kids what's what,

Reegs: the village crazy lady.

Sidey: but she's just like no filter. She's just honest and whatever. Whereas the old man comes in. He's like, stop scaring the kids with these silly stories.

And you can tell he's like overly protective.

Reegs: The chieftain. It's Temuera Morrison from he was in six days, seven nights.

Sidey: was. Yeah. Nice

Dan: Different, different character.

Reegs: Yeah, and he's protective of the island, and he's encouraging his daughter, Moana, who's listening to these stories. And in fact, she's distracted when the stories bleed into the real world, when the kids all get scared, don't they?

And then she goes off down to the water. This is where the ocean sort of chooses her. She's beckoned slowly in to receive a a shell, a conch shell, isn't it? Yeah,

Pete: Yeah. She's like, yeah, the, the, the shells right there on the beach and she's interested in she sees a little turtle. So she helps that. And then the, the, so the sea then

Dan: does this kind of abyss thing, doesn't it?

Where it comes up and Right.

Pete: really cool. And almost turns to see into like an aquarium so she can walk out into it and see the turtles going

past

Reegs: looks

Dan: like the sea parts. So she can wander along the,

Sidey: That's right.

Pete: But then presents her with another gift.

Dan: Yeah. This green stone,

Pete: Which is the heart of Te Fiti. One thing we didn't mention in the build up, and I'm not going to do this all the way through, but As soon as Maui steals the heart and, and the island starts disintegrating or whatever, as he's, like, hightailing it out of there, he's confronted by a volcanic goddess called Takar, who, like, the narrator tells you is another, like, you know, being that is craving the heart of, of Te Fiti as well.

He then, like, has, like, clashes with, with Takar, there's a big explosion, and then you hear that Maui's never been seen again.

Reegs: Yeah.

Sidey: It's, and we're told about his fishhook, that

Pete: Yeah. That's where,

Sidey: power to transform.

Reegs: fish hook was consumed by the ocean. Because

Pete: and the heart was lost.

Sidey: So all that's happened now, the heart has been presented to this infant child when we see her first and the old man's doesn't want to really anywhere near the water, which is difficult on a tiny little island like

Dan: It's a

Reegs: the grandma has clocked it as well and has seen because she also has a special relationship with the ocean too.

Sidey: Yeah.

Reegs: And we're gonna see then Moana sort of grow up and progress. She's got the sort of, Burden of leading the, the, the clan on her. And she's torn between following her own path and following the traditions of her heritage.

Pete: because she's essentially being groomed to become the leader of the island and we see the,

Sidey: one day you'll put your rock on the thing. Yeah.

Pete: dad takes her out to like the highest peak where they were like, sort of like slabs that are put

Sidey: good rock climbing content for you.

Pete: That is very good rock content. Yeah. And yeah, mountain climbing content. But the idea is that each leader then raises the island even higher with their rock and so on. And so that's her destiny according to her family, but not according to herself because it's calling.

Sidey: she's got high purpose.

Yeah,

Reegs: And I think we get all of that in one of the best songs. We've already had a few, which we haven't mentioned the name of, but it's in, that's where you are is the song. And it is really a song about sustainability and tradition and responsibility and heritage and heritage. And it's like just a brilliant piece of like storytelling and

Sidey: the island gives us what we need

Reegs: All that stuff. But the island is not giving them. What they,

Sidey: no the island fucks them right over

Reegs: they need, the nets are coming back empty. The coconut that's diseased. Yeah.

Sidey: what if we go beyond the reef

Pete: No, No, Moana

is fixated on this idea of going because that's

what she lusts for but Yeah, but

not before her dad said, listen, you don't do that.

It's, it's too dangerous.

Yeah, but the, the grandmother eggs are on in, in a

sort

Sidey: that's fucking that's isn't it annoying when grandparents fucking like do that

Pete: you shouldn't have sweets before

Sidey: They undermine you

Pete: give you sweets before, give them sweets

Sidey: They fucking undermine you

Dan: never did that when they were your parents.

Sidey: This is no joke though This is going out into the fucking ocean on a little fucking tiny little

Reegs: boat,

Sidey: basically and she's given a warning shot where a wave crashes on her and she is pinned into the reef and she has to quickly You thinks quickly and gets a rock out and manages to free herself and comes back and, and the grandmother spots her and says, Oh, you've been fucking about, you know, and she says, Don't tell dad, he's like, I'm his mother.

I don't have to fucking tell him anything,

Pete: anything.

Reegs: Well, and also she, she tells him about where the, his reservations come from, right? Because in his youth, he also attempted to go out beyond the reef. So,

Sidey: but,

we know inevitably

Pete: friend of his, died doing it. So that's why he he's reluctant.

Yeah.

Sidey: But inevitably, you know, as a leader, she's going to have to still lead, you know, the island, but do it in a different way.

There's, they, you know,

Reegs: She's going to have to think bigger. She's going to have to think about how far she'll go to do it.

Sidey: What a song that would have been.

Dan: Different solution than she's like put a coconut grove over there. Maybe we'll fish somewhere else on the

Sidey: But it's not going to work. She knows that. They all know it, really. They

Pete: we know what's coming

Sidey: And she's discovered, she's discovered by the cave that they were once voyagers,

Pete: this is it so the grant the reason why the grandmother is encouraging the life beyond the reef is because she's aware of the actual like the ancestral history of their island and You wouldn't believe it, but they were in fact voyagers and she leads her to the cave, shows all the boats that were then put away when, when the chief, her dad said that it was all too dangerous and so on.

But then there's a sort of a, you know, she bangs on a drum and then this kind of like flashback of, of the ancestry with another great song tells her all about that. So now she knows this, this is the real calling and that's I I need to answer it

Sidey: And the grandmother's on her deathbed, isn't She got

Pete: she's got a sick stingray tat on her

Sidey: And

Reegs: said that when she comes back she's coming back as a stingray.

Sidey: Yeah. And she tells Moana, fuck this thing off back to Feti.

Reegs: She, well, she basically, she never explicitly tells her what to do, but she's always, and she just acknowledges like the struggle between who she wants to be and who she should be like that pressure. And she just kind of tells her to follow her heart and that sort of

Pete: thing.

I'd say she absolutely distinctly tells her what to do. She literally says, like, carry the, you know, take the heart, go out into the sea, find Maui, tell him that you're,

Dan: on a

Pete: you need to deliver Maui to, to Fiti to replace the, the heart and so on. So, yeah.

Sidey: But she does die. And then we see the like image, like almost like phosphorescent image of a stingray, like zoom out into the water.

Maybe we'll see it again at some point. Then really like the, the sort of journey then starts, isn't it? She goes out into the waters. She has to get past the reef, this big wave that comes down, but she's in a, I don't know, a slightly bigger

Dan: She

Pete: Well, it's this one from the cave because all the ones that they have are just like little fishing ones, but these ones were like voyaging boats that they've got a big sail at the front.

So as you're going over the bigger waves, you, you hoist that and it pulls the front down to stop you

Dan: And she's got a a companion with her as well, isn't she? In the,

Reegs: Hey, hey, the chicken. I like this character because he's like kind of ugly. He's the comedy sidekick character, but he's like not overly cutesy, ugly and stupid. That's really is his thing. And you know, not easy to sell a toy off. So I kind of like, Alan

Sidey: Steve the pirate. Yeah. From

Pete: Yeah, there's not a lot of voice work needed for it. We first see him eating a rock, and, and a, and a local guy wants to cook him.

Sidey: Yeah. That's also

Pete: Oh, is it? Okay.

Sidey: Anyway, so it goes out and then there's gonna be various hijinks. So I don't think we need to run through like every single thing that happens. But the first one is that it's apparent that she, she's not, she's got the skillset yet that she needs, and there's a storm that happens and she is.

Pete: Yeah,

luckily there's, in order to find Maui, there's a gigantic constellation in the sky that is a, that is a fish hook that points to exactly where she needs to go, so she didn't

Reegs: but she, she can't do shit though. At this time, like you say, it's, there is a big storm.

She's like, Oh, help me the ocean. And this is what the ocean gives her a storm, but she does wake up on the island. And this is where we get the introduction to the rock as Maui. And it's absolutely brilliant with the song. You're

Sidey: it's absolutely brilliant with the song, You're Welcome.

Yeah, but he's also instantly, like, gets away with

Reegs: Yeah, but he's also instantly, like, gets away with it all as well, it's like, because he's so charismatic.

Because

Sidey: that

Pete: also instantly, like, gets

away with it as well. Because he's so charismatic.

Sidey: a big doofus.

Pete: And he is, yeah.

Reegs: He spends most of the time just boasting about how brilliant he is, you know? And that's, that is encapsulated in the song. You're welcome. And it brings us that brilliant, like it's been meme to death or whatever. The two, what's got

Pete: he's got see thumbs and holds up the sky. Yeah.

When you were waddling a high, this guy Yeah,

Sidey: guy.

Pete: all the words. Sorry.

Sidey: know all the words, sorry. It's covered in tattoos that

Pete: by side, he's like a big rectangle.

Jumps around the tattoos and yeah, basically he's just like poking fun at him the whole time. But it's also like his conscience and, and everything. Yeah,

Reegs: Yeah.

done.

And he also signs an oar with the chicken and makes a joke about Twitter, which now is another thing that Elon Musk has fucking

ruined.

Sidey: So he's gonna be the kind of, mentor

to Moana. Show her, show her the skills

Pete: well, first of all, you next her boat and locks her in the cave and chuffs off, but she manages to escape and then he's trying to get rid of her.

But the sea keeps delivering her back to the boat. So he realizes, right, we're strapped in for this. So might as well go along with it.

Reegs: Yeah, that's it, the ocean is just saying, you will do this journey together

Dan: ocean is just saying you will do this journey together. Yeah, because

Reegs: the,

mission's going to make him do it.

Yeah, well it ended up

Dan: hold it close. He's like, no, no, I don't like it. I don't like

Pete: Well, it ended up isolating him on an island for 1000 years.

So,

Reegs: So they get attacked by this, like a bunch of like tiny

Sidey: coconut

Reegs: pirates

Pete: Milky Joe and his mates.

Reegs: Yeah. And it's like these sort of like almost Mad Max or

Pete: Yeah, it is.

Reegs: sequences, these huge drums going and this chaotic sequence, which you don't really need to go into.

They escape from the

Sidey: boat. That I find that one like I really I enjoyed it but most of it's Based on stories, you know, Polynesian hits. And this one's just like a weird. I

Reegs: I assume that was another,

Sidey: I guess it was. It's

Reegs: The Kamo. I assume that was another another Polynesian story woven through it.

Sidey: one I didn't know about I suppose.

So they they nick the ring temper at the ring. The um the the hearts and they they're marijuana. It's actually Maui bottles. He's just like well all he really cares about is getting his fish hook back. Yeah. But she does. She manages to retrieve that with a nice bit of energy. Heroic, yeah, it is.

Yeah. And then they check off. He's like, right. Well, in that case, what would do when I can't do anything to have you until I get my fishhook. So they're going to need to go and retrieve that. He thinks if there's one person who's like to have it, it would be that bottom feeding somewhere or other.

Yeah.

Reegs: Yeah.

Sidey: So that's

Pete: by Jermaine Clement, which is,

Sidey: it's a highlight.

Pete: yeah, it's, it's absolutely brilliant. They, they discover the island. Well, he knows where the island is. They go at this massive kind of like

Sidey: rock climbing fee.

Pete: monolith.

Yeah. I mean, I'd have scaled that in a trice. And then he has to do it like a funky little hacker at the top to open it up and they drop down into the, the realm of the monsters, which is where, so, which is kind of like a.

Yeah, it's like a world beneath the sea that

Reegs: is literally above them,

Pete: them. Yeah. Yeah

Reegs: And it's like blacklit and neon and all UV and stuff is really

Pete: Yeah, it's a cool aesthetic down there. But they can't they come they stumble across the cave like pretty quickly.

Sidey: Maybe my favorite song this,

Pete: Ah This is a banger

Sidey: So Jermaine Clarin, like it's a giant crab.

is

like a magpie, just hordes yeah. Shiny trinkets.

Reegs: And he loves to talk about

Sidey: Yeah. Yeah. And he sings the shiny song. It's fucking brilliant. And he does have the, the fish hook on, right?

On the, like the very pinnacle at the top of his shell. Yeah. At the top.

Reegs: he is literally the horde of money, isn't he? Yeah. Behind him. She goes in his bait or whatever, and then he rises up to sing his song.

Yeah. Anyway, Maui goes to get his fish hook and then finds that he's got a kind of premature ejaculation. He can't kind of, he just sort of

Sidey: Is that a practice?

Yeah.

So,

Reegs: so she distracts him with some bioluminescence algae thing, which I think he literally explains to, to the whole audience.

Pete: diversion.

Sidey: whole

Reegs: what he's doing. And then they're shot back to the surface via a geezer, I think.

Sidey: that's right.

Reegs: And then this is the first time that Maui is kind of sincere and contrite and he's humbled. By the fact that he's, you know, can't control his powers and all that stuff and he this is where she then starts to get him to tell his story Because he talks about his parents

Pete: Abandon him at birth.

He'll throw him in the sea, Yeah.

Reegs: Harsh.

Sidey: Harsh.

Reegs: Yeah. And yeah, then he, he describes what you were saying earlier, that

his tattoos

Pete: describes what you were saying earlier, that his tattoos show

Reegs: the shark

and

He'd done everything for the love of people, hadn't he? And that hadn't been enough and then he thought that he'd been gifted this power by the gods and then she's saying, no, the power comes from that kind of

Sidey: able

Reegs: he does eventually start being able to control his powers,

Sidey: a connection now and he's going to teach her the ways of the seafarer, the wayfarer, the voyager, all that sort of shit.

And basically involves holding your hand up and he puts his hand in the water. Brilliant. He puts his hand in the water and she's looking at him. And then later on when he's explaining, he's like, if you put your hand in the water and you can feel a warm current. You're doing X. So she puts it in and he's

Reegs: taking a

Pete: good, that whole sequence is such a good dynamic between the two like characters of you know he's, he's warming to her and he's taking on like a sort of a like a bigger brother sort of like thing and but she's like super keen but he's also respecting that she's Gone down into the realm of the monsters and held her own.

And so, and so he, he, he sees that this girl's worth kind of working with as opposed to against Yeah.

Reegs: So now I mean we're coming quite towards the end of the movie

Sidey: Well, it's the end game isn't it?

Reegs: what was it? called take take take

Pete: to

Sidey: is the lava monster. We've

Reegs: They've got to get past Takkar, the giant lava monster, and there's some shenanigans like spraying water onto Takkar to cool it down

Sidey: Also Marwana doing some badass sailing maneuvers, she's skilled up now. She can, you know, really throw that thing around and,

Reegs: It is a really dazzling sequence that involves both of them just being, doing all their stuff.

The Wayfair, the changing the animals, although Maui does get taken out halfway through

Pete: well, this is it. This like the whole end part is, is elongated by the fact that they try it.

She's a little bit, sort of too keen to, to get it done. And so it ends up with the taka hitting them with a, you know, with

another punch that sends them

Sidey: But where they're, where they're coming from, Takara is in between them and, and the island is where they need to put the hut, so they think.

So they have to get around it. So effectively, Maui goes as a kind of diversion to attack I mean, this Takara thing is fucking enormous.

Reegs: It's an enormous fire monster thing. It's, and it looks incredible

Sidey: And it, but it does allow, Moana to get to the island and she climbed more rock climbing concept. Are

Pete: Not the first time.

Reegs: Yeah, not the first

Sidey: know but she

Pete: Essentially, they get cast back. Maui fucks off.

Reegs: He breaks his fish. He says like, Oh, one more hit is going to break my fish hook. I'm out. That's like that. What was that movie? Oh, it's The Magnificent Seven.

He's like, yeah, one more.

Pete: Yeah, but what's and then she's then sort of like abandoned and the boats broken and Mary's left her and and then but then her Grandmother revisits her in sort of like ghost for in like force ghost form.

It's

Sidey: yeah, it is. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Pete: and then

Reegs: oh, you're right. Not to skip this 'cause it's, I am Moana

Sidey: Yeah, that's true. Yes.

Pete: like the big sort of crescendo

Reegs: Yeah. Yeah.

Pete: Of the piece, but

it gets her, she's, she's thrown the, the the heart into the sea, she doesn't want it, or the sea actually comes and takes it off her and drags it down to the depths. Cause she said that she doesn't want the burden of trying to save everyone for this, but the grandmother comes back as a false ghost and talks her

Sidey: stop being a silly prick. You

Pete: She dives down, gets it, and then that's it. She's going to go back and do it herself. So the second time she cleverly. Does all the maneuvers to get past to car to get to the, to the other side where the island is just at the right moment when she's about to get struck down again. Maui's had a crisis of conscience and returns in hawk form and he's got his mojo

Sidey: like, this is like hand solo a period in the fucking men falcon.

Pete: And, and then more Star Wars references because there's the hands getting chopped off with, with like, of, of

Sidey: the car.

Pete: So yeah, he's keeping Takara occupied while she gets to, to

Sidey: the, but he does take that, hit, that smashes his completely

Pete: destroys the fish egg. So now he is, he's powerless, but he's still defiantly then doing like huckers and he's like, go on then.

And just as the Takara is going to destroy Maui forever that you see this green,

Sidey: Well, first of all, first of all, Moana goes up there and there's nothing where the island should be.

Reegs: looks down, yeah.

Sidey: There's an imprint of where someone might have been lying. Yeah.

And then she looks round and she figures it out and the camera hopefully just like highlights the heart bit is on Takar like where it would go and she's like I get it now that thing appeared at the exact same time that

the heart was

taken and so yeah like you say she holds it up at this beacon of light appears which Takar sees And still comes across, great

Reegs: but she calms as she

Pete: she sings, she sings it a nice song.

Sidey: song. da da

Pete: to find you. I know your name.

Sidey: And yeah, Takah

Pete: the

heart from inside you.

Sidey: She kneels down and she plonks it on her and like vegetation

Pete: Gives it, gives it like a, you know, a Polynesian kiss with a, with a nose to nose,

Sidey: headbutt, Yeah, yeah. And yeah, it's restored Te Fiti back to,

Pete: Yeah, but that, even that visually, the scene of like, you know, Takar like, shedding the volcanic rock, like, skin, to then grow all like, the lush kind of greenery and trees

Sidey: the green goddess.

Pete: Yeah, yeah, yeah, it's, it is amazing and Yeah, first of all, she kind of like, sits on the top of this like, mountain where the island was and raises them up to kind of like look at them where Maui's all contrite about having stolen the heart and you know, she's thanking Moana and gives Maui his restored fish hook back.

And then she settles down back into that,

Sidey: She gives them back a boat as well.

Pete: gives him a boat as well, cooks up a boat. Yeah settles down and becomes the island of Te Fiti again, which immediately then just sends all the, The good vibes across the sea and all the, the rots and the, you know, cancerous looking sort of stuff just disappears from the, from all the other surrounding islands.

Reegs: Yep.

Sidey: Yeah, well we've just got to go home. Yep. Face the music for being a fucking disobedient little bitch.

Reegs: go home. Yep. Face the

Pete: you have a master wayfinder already. It's you. Yeah.

Reegs: fucking disobedient little bitch.

Vegas, was it? Vegas.

Fair enough. And she takes a fleet of boats out onto the sea to yet another banging tune.

Pete: a reprise of the, the Ancestral song they do, which in half like native language, half English. It's

Sidey: a she kind of has to reteach our old man how to do the stuff and remind them all how to do the, the skills,

Reegs: She leads her people, you know, the conservative, in fact, all the women in this, the grandmother and her, and they're even in, you know, it shows it's obviously a big thing in Polynesian culture, which this so beautifully showcases is powerful women in the stories as well.

Sidey: She,

she goes up to leave her stone, but she leaves the conch shell on there.

Pete: Is a bit selfish because now it's going to be tough for the next person

Sidey: Well, they've fucked off on that island, haven't

Pete: Yeah, no, I think that's their home but they will they will travel but

Reegs: Yeah,

Sidey: they will, travel, but

Reegs: movie

Pete: and flies along with them as well

Dan: Yeah, there was there was one point right at the beginning actually and she says, Oh, I really like pork and she looks at the pig

Reegs: Yeah. And,

Dan: the pigs like

Pete: like.

Dan: get moving its eyes a bit shifty. And um,

Pete: is the pig.

Yeah,

Dan: yeah, I mean, it works on so many levels, doesn't it? It's I watched, I miss this with the kids.

I mean, that's the sweet spot. Obviously, you're watching this with the kids because it's one of those films that as an adult, you'll enjoy with. Watching with a kid even more so, remember they used to be torturous watching kids films and things. He's used to, as an adult, you know, God, there's nothing. I mean, this is absolutely fantastic.

It is the songs hit home the, the jokes, the characters, the story, as you say, the bringing up a rich culture to the screen like this showcasing all the richness of it and, and. It's educational then it's it's more than just a cartoon. Yeah, it's it's a big win

Sidey: It's bigger than that, it's, it's huge. The the, obviously the storytelling is great, it's showcasing something that a part of the world Probably seen some bits, but it doesn't get a lot of exposure necessarily. Yeah. So the songs are absolutely banging. I think it looks absolutely incredible.

Yeah. I think this is fucking way, way, well I prefer this a fucking shit load more than Frozen and Frozen go hell. I've sooner watch this. You know, every time. I,

Pete: I think the best thing about this for me is, is in spite of the fact that you got other Disney films where the songs are brilliant, the characters are great and funny and everything. But what this does is takes like a it's this is Disney when it's it's best for me because it takes a culture that.

Especially, you know, it's biggest audience would be the States and, and, but, you know, I've been out to New Zealand and touched upon the outskirts of this kind of thing, but just to take this like cultural stuff and elevate it to like a global level to stay true to the, like, you know, the, the, the source culture, but also make it like, you know, consumable by a global audience at the same time is like,

I imagine that the benefits of Polynesian Islands and that sort of culture are now being seen just because even of this film, because it's just, you know, brought it into the limelight and done such a good thing with

Reegs: also like it also deals with that like push and pull between tradition and heritage and what you have to do to evolve those communities as well, which is like a really relevant theme for those islands too.

And hopefully they're going to explore that sort of thing in Moana too.

Pete: Yeah, later this year, November

Sidey: Thanksgiving Pete, yeah.

Reegs: wonder if it will hit like this because like, it was so perfect in our house. The kids loved it.

Dan: won't hit

Reegs: right age and the soundtrack was, we listened to the soundtrack endlessly, the car

Dan: It'd have to go some to, to get close to

this, to

Sidey: long as it's close. Close would be good enough.

That would still be epic. strong

Reegs: Strong

Pete: The strongest possible. Recommend

Sidey: Right, this is set on our island.

Reegs: Jersey.

Pete: Not all of this

Sidey: just set, but filmed, you know, on location and that brings an extra level of enjoyment to us because obviously we have local knowledge specifically around the geography of it. And one of the things that I like to watch when you see this back is not only how things used to look and you go You know, I used to live there and look how much it's changed But also when he would like come out of the tunnel and appear at latak and stuff like that.

He's like, oh, it's so funny Yeah

Pete: Well, they, they, in this episode, I, like, Charlie Hungerford is on Victoria Avenue in his, in his

Sidey: in his roles

Pete: just as he comes off Victoria Avenue, he, like, ends up rolling past Longville Manor.

And I was like

Sidey: but you know, that aside, you know, we, looking back on it and watching it again for this, the question is, I guess is it actually any good or is it just pure nostalgia

Reegs: pure nostalgia test? I'll be honest, I was coming in fairly sceptical on this. The only thing I, like, felt was the music was banging. I knew that, but other than that, I was like, I don't think I like this at the time. Then I, then I saw that the running time of this episode was 55 minutes.

I was like, fucking hell,

Sidey, thanks for that.

Sidey: hell, Sidey, that's But

Pete: But it's SPARTA

with it's

Reegs: an acronym.

Pete: yeah.

Sidey: And

Reegs: And believe it or not, this is a James Bond style

Sidey: not, this is a James Bond style

Reegs: Operating out of a remote French, a tiny French island. Yeah.

Sidey: a remote French, a tiny French island. Like, one of the ones I'd seen not so long ago. He's he's out in St. Oben, he's in, like, the old courthouse and all that, so it's quite entertaining to see, actually. Most of this takes place in Chaucer, which

Reegs: Chazy. Yeah. Which

Sidey: French, so you don't get that luxury in this, but I think we all, all we see is Bit of Victoria Avenue and Longfield Manor, which probably is not allowed

to change at all.

Pete: is

Reegs: got married there. Yeah.

You

Pete: the channel.

I'm worried that, yeah. Yeah. So, I didn't know, I didn't pick up

Sidey: Yeah. So, I didn't know, I didn't pick up on this when I watched this as a kid, but, Berserker's an alcoholic.

And that, that's his thing.

Pete: he's a recovering

Sidey: Yes. But

you're, you're of an aqua and he's also a fucking player.

Reegs: Yeah. I, that I did not realize. But yeah, he's got a, a litany of chicks after him, including a woman who will feature prominently in this episode. She's sort of his Morty, except he wants to fuck her. Philip Avail.

Sidey: Yeah. Vicky's

Pete: Lisa Goddard, who I remember being like a bit of a siren in like British

Sidey: TV.

Reegs: And

twice in this she's involved in scenes where she's either tied up or tying someone else up on a bed.

There's

Sidey: there's a lol, the

Reegs: the maid titters outside. Ooh, they're having sex, but

Pete: Yeah, cause there was

Sidey: So she's

Pete: I was watching this when the kids were around whilst I was watching it and there's a scene where there's like, ah, ah, like, and

Sidey: ah. Right,

Pete: like squeaking and

Sidey: this is on pre Watershed. It's And I remember watching one, where there was, they were out Maybe the Acre Hose or something like that. So some other little islands and there was a corpse under the water. And I remember seeing it and it was primary school age and seeing a dead body.

Like it, it's like jaws when it, you know, comes out, you're not expecting it. Fuck. It's really like way too young to be seeing that. And so there's stuff in there that, so, this what's her name, Vicky Vale she's like a master thief, we're, we're told, and she's nicked some, she's nicked a diamond choker,

And

there's, in this safe was also this book, which contains,

Reegs: This guy comes after her, like, where's the book? Where's the notebook? She doesn't know anything about it.

Sidey: Yeah, the book that was in the safe where she's robbed the jewels from contains all the members of this Sparta organization. And they don't obviously don't want that getting

Reegs: Yeah. so

Sidey: So that's the plot of this is that

Pete: also all of their like illicit goings on and so on as well.

Sidey: Yeah, so so they do some like anti money laundering training, and they they're able to track the source of funds.

From this

Reegs: Through the chocolate place, Leonidas to

Sidey: But,

Reegs: to that, to show Z, to Sir Clive.

Sidey: but this guy who, who comes, who confronts her, because it starts off, I think they're in Spain or somewhere, yeah.

Pete: yeah. Cause the first thing is she's by the pool and he comes over, says something Spanish and goes you have a nice bum.

So

Dan: Smooth talker.

Sidey: But so the

the scene that you mentioned Pete is where she says, okay, I'll get you your book after he's got her at knife point and knocks him out with the Bible, the good book. Yeah. And then that's the thing where she's tied him up.

And, and this guy like recur, recurs and he comes around and he confronts her.

in Longville Manor. And he's going to just inject her, like Lucy Letby style.

he's going to inject her with a syringe just full of air.

Reegs: Oh,

is that what was going on

Sidey: That's to give her some sort of embolism.

Reegs: give her an embolism, yeah. It was just going to be full

Sidey: And he, but he does it to Jim because Jim, Jim's waiting. Well he's, he's coming to find out and he goes, and the violence, so we used to like, we used to fight choreography of like a slightly elevated like status now this is, but I guess it was all like this at the time.

It's so, it's so,

Reegs: ropey.

Sidey: so bad.

Pete: wanker fighting as well. He has a few fights in this.

Reegs: battered. Like, Nettles is pretty bad at fighting. Like, obviously he has not

Sidey: It's like he goes back for a punch and it takes a good 10 seconds and in the meantime the guy like clobbers him and it's all like that. I mean, I'm not even exaggerating. That's how labored it is.

Reegs: yeah, so why doesn't he get an embolism then?

Sidey: I think he just stabs him with the needle. He just gets the needle goes in and breaks off and he doesn't get to push it in.

Yeah.

Reegs: anyway, they have to go off to Chosy, to Sir Clive's,

Sidey: it

Reegs: And there's a B plot as well that's going on at the same time, which is his boss, Charlie.

Pete: What is Charlie he's not even police is he's just his mate who walks around with massive cigars all the time.

Sidey: so I guess he was a big actor at the time because it was I think in his contract that he would have Like, you know a big say in all these plots So he crops up in just about every single plot of in every episode of somehow You know, like comedically, like getting, you know, entangled in these fucking big

Pete: Yeah, because his subplot is that he's basically sweet on, yeah, he's sweet on the, like, the police secretary or whatever, and wants to

Reegs: Who is

Pete: Although it alludes to the fact, when they all come together for breakfast in that hotel, that he's got a partner, because obviously Bergerac has, so it's almost like they've both been caught doing the dirty on their

Reegs: Yeah, but how bogging must his wife be if that's his bit on the side?

Peggy

Pete: is a munter. Yeah.

Reegs: looks like Pat Butcher.

Sidey: time. Yes, it turns out that the book hasn't been stolen by Vicky Vail, it's the wife of Sir

Reegs: Who obviously stole it. Yeah. The one that, like, as soon as she's introduced,

Sidey: it's, it's like, Zero Effect, where they just put it in the chair that he's sitting.

So it's in a leather, like, wingback chair that he

Pete: Kind of like the one you're

Reegs: on. His favourite

Sidey: And it's just to the side of where he's sitting, like, it's just down the cushion. And that's where she stashed it. And so they go in and they managed to retrieve it. And then there's a chase.

Pete: One thing I do want to mention is that, so the wife lady, lady Hamer is doing all these portraits and so on, but at all times she's being guarded by Donald Trump. Like, he's got the same hair, like you can't really see his face. He's got a cap on. I'm sure it's like a MAGA cap, but like, I couldn't stop thinking

Reegs: Philippa has to distract him doesn't she down by the beach by being sexy.

Yeah,

Pete: Yeah. And then, and then eventually like Berger manages to overpower him and throw him in the, in the harbor,

Reegs: They do a switch of the book, there is a, right, they do a switch, the old switcheroo with the book, then they do have the escape. It's worth talking about because suddenly they've got quad bikes.

Pete: they're not quad bikes. They're tri

Reegs: Tri bikes,

Sidey: They turn up on them

Reegs: jeeps, right, and they race along the fucking coast, down to the harbour. This was fucking amazing. Then it suddenly turns into like a shootout with machine guns. Honestly, and pistols and all that on Charlie's boat gets blown to fucking smithereens. Then they obviously ran out of budget to shoot the scene because they have, they just

Sidey: it just stops. Yeah. And I thought, Oh, someone's going to die.

Reegs: and they just show freeze frames from the fight because they obviously didn't finish the fight or whatever.

Dan: It was a style, they did

Pete: Yeah, but you just, you see, one of them, can't remember who it is, just basically calling, maydaying the French, like, police, to, to come to this, and then it just cuts, to them all, like, stood around casually whilst the police are walking around arresting

Sidey: But the, there's those sort of stills that they do. It's like the end of blackhead, you know, when it goes.

'cause obviously they've got no audio to play over that. Yeah. It's just silent. And you think, oh, someone's gonna die. Like it's, they're doing it as a like really somber piece. No, it just cuts back to the rest of it. And

Reegs: the story being wrapped up there's, there's time for Philippa to kind of escape

via

Sidey: time for Phillipa to kind of escape via the boat.

Jim's just looking out, he's stood on the rail, he's stood by the rail and looking out at the sea. And Johnny goes, oh, you know, she got away and blah blah blah, and he's like, oh yeah, what a fucking bummer. And then she just fucking bombs it apart, she's nicked one of the French police boats.

Pete: how? How she gets away? Is that he she reminds him that this is not from the Jersey Police. This is not his jurisdiction, so technically he can't arrest her on this, you know, on this territory, so he Gives her up to the French police, who of course aren't looking for her.

Reegs: Who are French, so

Pete: were French, so they're totally incompetent.

Or maybe they do arrest her, but then they go off for a ciggy break and she just, she steals a police boat. And you see her coming along. Yeah, in, in, in like the French, but in the like the gendarme gear or whatever, riding this like speed boat. Takes her like, you know, police outfit off, like quite seductively again.

And then like, bogs off into the, into the ocean

Sidey: Down, down, down

Pete: Ah, and,

Reegs: And

Pete: And

for those who don't know the soundtrack, Sidey will play it here.

Reegs: I am proposing. I've had this idea where we've been talking about

right

Sidey: The week goes extras,

Reegs: that we, that we review every episode like bad dads. We'll do like a, a, a, a continuous

Sidey: All the midweekers when it comes out

Reegs: Yeah. Can just be the bad. It can be Bergerac.

Sidey: know, it's, we're not going to enjoy it. know it. I fucking

Reegs: fucking love this. I

Sidey: Yeah, it's amazing.

Reegs: I

Sidey: So this was, this was, although, although we're presenting it as like a thing that we like because we're from Jersey.

This was a fucking big hit for the BBC. It ran for 10 years. It was expensive. It was shot on 16 mil film.

Reegs: good. You could tell, you could

Sidey: from when they run out of money.

Pete: Yeah. Ha ha ha ha

Sidey: Um, John Jim,

Jim Bergerac, his gaff in this is a rustic barn conversion. Do you see where it actually is located?

No, you wouldn't be able to live in it anymore. It's in Queens Valley.

Pete: Oh,

they flooded it, didn't they? Yeah, because that was built into the plot of one of the episodes because they literally flooded Queen's Valley in order to create the reservoir.

What's also of note is that I think series five on, no, three onwards, the headquarters were at Haute de la Garenne. And that famously made the the national news for being a former like, you know, Children's home where there was lots of yeah touchy feely stuff going on

Sidey: It was more what? No,

Pete: It was more what?

No, I think it was more like bumming and stuff, but there was, there was a big thing where there was that's fine. That's, that's completely fine. There is a, it made the national news because, and again, it made like Jersey look like arseholes because the people, the police found a child skull, which turned out to be literally a

Sidey: Joe,

Pete: husk.

yeah.

Reegs: Yeah. Yeah

Pete: So yeah, that was another little bit there. This, the, like, the fight scenes were horrendous, but I guess everything was at the time. Obviously, I think the thing that must have appealed, like, even, you know, to people not from Jersey and so on, was the, like, the locations and things. It does look, it does showcase Jersey quite,

Sidey: We have to remember back then, this was, this was a proper holiday

Pete: Yeah, yeah, yeah,

Dan: And, and also the other thing, we do recognize lots of the places, but we know a lot of people that are on it. So, as mentioned before.

Sidey: you been on this?

Reegs: Top of my head, yeah, they did an episode in the synagogue.

Sidey: My school was in it. I remember them filming, but we weren't in it. Just used the building, whatever.

Dan: remember the filming, but we weren't in it. Just used the building.

Lots of people know people that have been in it or otherwise walking through a slightly bigger part and it's going to carry on because they've been

Sidey: Well yeah, they shut town down, they closed a load of roads at a weekend. Were

you tempted

Dan: you tempted to

Sidey: There was a lot of, there was a lot of tut tut.

Fucking hell, I'm trying to get somewhere, you know. Yeah, yeah.

Reegs: In fact, they're filming,

today, that's pretty cool,

Sidey: Yeah, I

know. I hope it's good. I really hope it's

Reegs: good. I'm really looking forward to the scene where the giant squid comes, because we saw obviously that on the set, didn't we?

World

Sidey: speaking of it as a it's not relevant, but Goonies sequel.

Pete: Oh my god.

Sidey: Really? Yeah. It was announced to the day

Dan: Giant octopus,

Reegs: What's the

point of that?

Pete: why

Sidey: money probably.

Pete: they bringing back Bergerac? I don't know.

Sidey: Because this

Reegs: I'd be well up for more Bergerac. I'm well into

Pete: thing. I mean, like, none of us in this room are qualified to say why this was good.

because of the level of nostalgia and the connection that we have

Sidey: You mean we're too close to it?

Pete: Yeah, we are too close to it. It needs to, we're not, we can't be like totally objective about this. Yeah.

Reegs: Well, I sort of disagree a little bit, just because I came into it, like, not really fancying it very much and was one over.

Because I think John Nettles was a

Sidey: he's really good.

He's really good.

Reegs: and the story it's written quite well, that, you know, there's like, the interactions between the characters are good. Like this one had a big budget, like that. Big chase at the end came out of nowhere really and all

that like,

Sidey: It's the, it's also the inspiration for Mindhorn.

Reegs: Oh man, I watched that about six months ago.

It's great. It's really

Pete: She spends her time

Reegs: She got she spends her time getting plastered

Sidey: He's horrible to her, he's horrible to her. And she had really yellow teeth.

Yeah.

Reegs: She, had a magnificent, she'd put a magnificent spread on for him and he'd

Pete: She did, yeah, she made like a picnic at

Sidey: I felt A little bit of sympathy for him because it what he does, you know, he had to go out But he was not very nice to her

Dan: W was it Inspector Crozier in this episode?

Sidey: was in it. Yeah from the bureau des atrangers

Dan: he, he was he came, did a bit of work. He touched you up at my place and yeah, he was, was a nice guy.

Really nice

Sidey: there he was

Dan: sadly passed away a year or two ago. But he was a, a gentleman, nice bloke.

Sidey: Strong,

strong recommend. I wanted to watch more.

Reegs: Well, we're going to watch the new one.

Dan: Well, let's go for

Pete: And we'll review

Sidey: Sound

Reegs: Strong theme this week. So I didn't do it justice with my reason. My like, I didn't have enough

Sidey: Well, we, because well, there was a, there was a a right to doings with what day we were gonna record on, wasn't there? But anyway, it was still strong. It

Pete: days, seven nights, maybe we could've, yeah, but, yeah.

Dan: Whose noms is it?

Pete: Harrison.

Dan: Is it come back around to me or is it are we

Sidey: Depends, if Pete, are you going to be here next week?

I don't Why don't you, why don't you just say yes?

Pete: Well, I just dunno.

Sidey: I'm sure you've got noms ready.

Dan: He's such a

Pete: I've got a lot of Game of Thrones to watch, so,

Sidey: Okay, well, you've seen that before.

Anyhow, we'll figure that out. All that remains is to say Sidey's signing out.

Reegs: Reegs is also out.

Pete: Dan's gone.