Copshop & Mr Bean: The Animated Series

Copshop

Reegs: Welcome to Bad Dad's Film Review, the podcast where three overgrown man children attempt to revisit their deserted love affair with movies after marinating in the exquisite source of parenthood for several years. In today's episode, we're serving up something special as we take a look at the service industry, and I actually really think you can tell quite a lot more about a person by the way they treat somebody who's in that.

Capacity. But anyway, from the charming to the surly to the servile and sociopathic, waiters and waitresses have done more than carry trays. They've carried entire scenes. So sit back and listen in as we discuss the top five waiters and waitresses. After that, we're moving on to our main course. The 2021 Gerard Butler and Frank Grillo action thriller Copshop before we finish things off with a look at one of Sidey's favourites as we plunge into the depths of the comedic genius known as Mr Bean with the episode Restaurant.

Prepare yourselves for a baffling display of idiocy as a grown man stumbles and bumbles through life, leaving a trail of second hand embarrassment in his wake. If you revel in witnessing the human experience reduced to a tragic comedy of errors, This episode might just be your magnum opus. A quick warning for you, this week's movie contains more twists than Escher's Staircase, so if you want to see it unspoiled, well, we're gonna have to part ways.

For everyone else, though, all that's left to do is introduce the dad, starting with Sidey. Whose new obsession is, of course, cue simulation. All the thrills of standing and waiting in line for something, but from the comfort of your own home. Which is just great, isn't it? You've been enjoying that a lot

Sidey: way to do it, yeah.

Reegs: And then, of course, Dan, relic of a bygone era where movies had intermissions and black and white was the new Technicolor. And finally, there's me, Reeds. And before we start, I would like to introduce you to a new section of the show, Reeder's Wives. I'm sorry, listeners letters. We're absolutely inundated with people trying to get hold of us here at bad dads Aren't we all the time at dad's film on what you know on the site that was formerly known as twitter Bad dad's jersey at gmail.

com And so we've got a few the first one from krishna who says greetings of the day I was checking your website and see you have good design and it looks great, but it's not ranking on google another Oh, no, hang on. That's probably not very interesting. That one is it? But let's have a look.

This one is from I'm a I'm a real person in Devon and she says, all the single fellas out there just a heads up that nothing gets your date hotter than taking to the movies and providing your own commentary in which you detail your thoughts on each actor's filmography, personal lives and fashion choices.

Remember your date has been eagerly waiting for your opinion so you should give it to her and I think that's Good tip. And lastly, we got this one this morning it goes like this, Dear Dads, love the podcast, it's like receiving a hug from a barbed wire fence. There's something for everyone. Dan's insight is a reminder that time marches on like a colonoscopy.

Sidey, you managed to find or make one flaw in a movie and magnify it, and Riggs, your ability to find joy in just about every film is a testament to the power of delusion. If I ever see any of you out and about, I'd lay one on you, and that's from Rabbi Barry Nonsensington.

Sidey: On

cheese,

Reegs: So we should stay out of his way, but thanks for taking the time to, it's really nice to have that listener engagement.

It's what we love here, isn't it? So,

Sidey: we do what we do.

Reegs: yeah.

Dan: Keeps us young.

Sidey: Have you watched anything this week, Dan? I'm pretty sure you must've

Dan: I, I have. I watched a, a film called Extinction with Michael Pena Pena

Reegs: Peña? Peña,

Dan: Pena and I know we talked about.

You might want to watch this, so I'm not going to say anything that would spoil that, but basically a man is having dreams of an invasion, and,

Reegs: what an extra terrestrial

Dan: an extraterrestrial invasion and he lives a very normal, happy, otherwise family life, and his wife is saying You need to, you know, having these nightmares keep waking up and it's affecting the kids now.

They've got two little girls. Anyway, I'll leave it. I'll leave it there. But it was it's one of the, I think it was around a 90 minute film. So I was looking for these. It was already quite late. So I

Reegs: It's a Netflix original, isn't it?

Dan: yeah, yeah, I think so. And I also watched a French film called five, which was it.

know what year, but it was, it was quite cool. It was these five very different characters, almost like the five different friends you can have, you know, there was one guy who was there for all the time, no matter what. There was another guy who was there for the good times. There was another girl who was, you know, that great for the parties and somebody was great, the optimist and all these kind of things.

So they

Reegs: The chubby Jewish one, the old

Dan: yeah, so they've got a beautiful kind of apartment in the center of Paris and then they have to start paying for it and they get into all kind of shenanigans. And yeah, it was quite decent. It was great. And there was some cock action in that as well. There was full frontal.

Yeah.

Reegs: It's always nice, yeah. I

Sidey: I watched, Ashoka. Alright. On Disney, the new

Reegs: Ashoka.

Sidey: Star Wars series. Dan, are you down?

Dan: I haven't seen it. No.

Sidey: No. No. Started last there's two episodes out last week and then there's gonna be one every Wednesday. I'm

Dan: started?

Sidey: started? Well, it's pretty good. I do, I do quite enjoy it, but Ashoka is probably the least interesting thing in it. Which was a surprise to me. But,

Dan: I

Sidey: It's,

Reegs: suspect if you've watched all the

cartoons and whatnot, it's a really quite thrilling

Dan: all the cartoons and was,

there

Sidey: So there was, there was something like six series of Star Wars Rebels and then three of Clone Wars or something. She was, Ashoka was Anakin Skywalker's

Reegs: pad one

Sidey: a, what, trainee,

Dan: Ah, okay.

Sidey: that's where she comes, but she only had previously existed in the animated stuff, so they've brought her out into this now so it's, it's not

Reegs: She's a sort of Jedi without a cause sort of

Sidey: She, well, she quit, so what I did was I watched, there was a YouTube video, there's... Plenty of them that brings you up to speed and everything that she had done that leads you into where we are now in the series. You've seen her, you've seen her in the Book of Boba Fett, I think, and,

Reegs: Yeah, she was in Mandalorian as well.

Dan: Yeah,

Sidey: so you will have seen her, she's got kind of like tentacle y things, and she's got double lightsaber.

Dan: Oh, right. Yeah,

yeah. Okay. But now she's got her own show. Yeah.

Sidey: yeah. So watch that. Yesterday we watched The Meg 2, The Trench. Yeah, nice.

Reegs: Yeah, nice.

Sidey: Which was...

Dan: Was that as good as youse?

Sidey: great. Was

Dan: Was that sarcasm, the

Sidey: that... No, it was dis, it Was disappointing. it

Dan: it that bad?

Sidey: yeah. There's some, like... How

Reegs: they go wrong?

It's

Sidey: I know.

Reegs: in there

Sidey: I know, it was,

Dan: again?

Reegs: Yeah? It's Ben Wheatley, I think, is the director as well.

Sidey: Yeah, it didn't really do it for me. We watched a James Bond film. Which one was it?

Dan: No, Skyfall,

Sidey: no, Skyfall. That was decent. And I'm sure there's been other things, but I forget, you know, I forget now. Oh, no, I watched Chinatown, which is great.

And I have been watching,

Dan: no. Alfred Roman Polanski. He's a stand up guy. And

Sidey: Our friend Roman Polanski. He's a, he's a stand up guy. And seven, actually, I watched seven.

Reegs: So You've watched

five and you've watched seven.

Dan: Oh,

Sidey: have you done six? I

Reegs: I'd have done 12, that would've been great, wouldn't it?

Dan: Or something.

Reegs: yeah. Or something.

Sidey: Did what did you watch though?

Reegs: Not a lot of in, not a lot of interest. I'm still plowing through Manifest.

Sidey: Oh, okay. So

Reegs: So yeah.

Sidey: Still, still a fan.

Reegs: Yeah. Like, it's like really stupid and played like bafflingly sincerely by everybody in it. So, that's like a lovely combination for me. It hits a sweet spot.

Dan: Okay, nice.

Reegs: Yeah.

Sidey: Any gangs in it?

Reegs: No, none at all. 'cause so we did Yeah. Very

Sidey: died, didn't

Reegs: Didn't Park, is Parki died, didn't he? I mean, with that kind of like

Sidey: Is he in a gang?

Reegs: rapport. No, I was thinking but that the way you segued

Sidey: Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. I could, you

Reegs: take over his slot.

Yeah. Which doesn't have anymore.

Sidey: Bevis nominated the Hmong gang from Gran Torino.

Dan: Oh,

Reegs: Oh, that's good.

Sidey: That's a really good shout, yeah. So, I think, well, I think we had five, but I think we were going to relegate Pete's maybe,

Reegs: Yeah, definitely, because Pete's

Sidey: And yeah, Bevis is in.

Dan: What up, Beaver?

Sidey: So we're straight into top five waiters slash waitresses. Yeah. But really obviously this is Chris's thing. I'm sure he would have had some great nominations. He'll have to tweet them in because

Dan: He's at the horse

Sidey: basically got his fucking days mixed up and he's fucking dropped us like a bad habit. But anyway, we'll, we'll crack on regardless.

Dan, do you want to kick us off?

Dan: Well, the one that I've I've put up first was Manuel from Fawlty Towers.

Well, he's a classic, isn't he? You know, he's he's just the Comedy waiter.

Reegs: he's a sort of dimwitted from Barcelona?

Dan: Yeah, from Barcelona.

Reegs: Often the target of Basil's sort of physical, you know, he beat him around a bit. Yeah, it wasn't clear whether he was sort of unable to communicate, you know, it was just that he was unable to communicate with Basil or or if he was just genuinely stupid.

Dan: it was a communication thing. Well, he always seemed to get the wrong end of the stick, didn't he? What? Whatever situation he was in led to the most just brilliant British comedy, actually.

Just fantastically silly, stupid,

Sidey: What was the stat? I think Pete in the group, he messaged about how old John Cleese was.

Thirty six, and he's...

Dan: Oh, he looks

Sidey: he He looks a lot older, yeah.

Reegs: Bowen effect.

Sidey: yeah,

Dan: But, yeah, he, he, when you think of waiters in television, film television, then he, he's gotta be in your list, isn't he Riggs?

He yeah.

Reegs: my list and he, yeah.

Sidey: I actually completely overlooked him, I have to say, which just feels stupid, but yeah, it's a good shout.

Dan: Over to you, Side.

Sidey: Oh, well, you know, I'm going to go for Buffy. I immediately thought of a specific Buffy episode. It's the season premiere of, from season three season two

Dan: Buffy heads! Like, it just gets right down to season 1, the end of...

My sister's like this, she loves it as well,

Sidey: Well, season two the finale was where Buffy had to kill her, the love of her life.

Angel, she stabbed him. And that was it. And so she goes, she runs away and she leaves town. She leaves And she goes off to his unnamed place and she's just waiting tables and she's going by her middle name, which is Anne and wouldn't you know it, one of the regular customers in the diner is like eating people's souls or something like that.

So, she just can't escape Slayer destiny. So she has to go back to it all. But what what I did learn was that originally, the first concept for the show was going to be Rhonda, the immortal waitress.

Dan: the

Reegs: right. Rather than Buffy the Vampire, she was going to be an immortal waitress, right? So that was her in a sort of alternate path,

Sidey: Yeah. So,

Dan: Particularly fitting for this week's episode then, yeah.

Sidey: Yeah.

Reegs: Yeah.

Dan: See?

Reegs: Probably one of the more famous waitresses, though she's not famous for being a waitress, more sort of famous for saving mankind or at least birthing the saviour, would be Sarah Connor.

In

the Terminator, she was a waitress and, but we see her and we see her go about her routine before she's sort of, well, you know, her life is interrupted by killing machines from the future as often happens. And what else? A bartender. What do we think about a bartender? Is that a waiter or a waitress?

You're not having

Sidey: I think that's a bartender. I think they're two separate...

Reegs: It's not, yeah. It's not,

Sidey: I think there's a distinction there.

Reegs: If Chris was here, he would say no. I think. Okay. Well

Dan: might be able to give us a few tips.

Reegs: How, you don't have to to do even turn up. Yeah, yeah. No, that's true.

Tarantino, he has a thing about Waiters and waitresses, I mean, Reservoir Dogs, the very first scene is Mr. Pink and the rest of the guys talking about tipping. While the waitress is in there, and then the actor who plays Mr. Pink, of course, is a waiter at Jackrabbit Slim's. It's Steve Buscemi.

um... Yeah,

Sidey: And,

Reegs: So yeah, that's a little, little, little thing. It's, it is not out the realms of possibility to say it's the same character in Tarantino's movie.

Sidey: yeah, yeah,

Reegs: yeah. So there, there you go.

Dan: okay, interesting

there's

loads of And we talk about pissing in soup and stuff like that.

There's loads of films. I can't remember the exact one, but I have an image of a woman

Going into

a a diner and apologizing after Like 20 years to this lady who worked in the diner for something and they had this big Heartfelt scene and she was like and they were both in the end and they were like, oh I'm crying and it was just a big Misunderstanding and went off and she went back and goes I feel so bad about pissing in her soup now And it just always reminds me as we talked about earlier.

Don't upset those people that that make your food and everything

Reegs: everything.

Dan: The waiter that I, I felt most sorry for was well not really though, the ones in Penrith, in, in, with Nail and I, in the Penrith Tea Rooms, when, with Nail and I go in there after about, you know, four pints of cider and three double whiskeys and, and start just saying they want to install a fucking jukebox in here, and they bought the place and everybody's gonna get sacked and they just stood there, This is terrible, I'm gonna call the police, call the police.

They always make me chuckle.

Reegs: Yeah.

Nice.

Sidey: I'm wearing the T shirt of Twin Peaks and someone who always caught my eye was Sally, was Shelly Johnson. She's played by, I don't know, I never know how to pronounce this exactly. Imagine, imagine

Super hard. She worked at the Double R Diner. I think she's the first one that interacts with Carmel Glocklin agent Cooper when he comes in and she's the first one that gives him the coffee is his ongoing thing.

And they keep having coffee. And she's married to the guy who's one of the suspects in the murder because he's like a violent, horrible scumbag. And it's also running drugs in his big rig Leo Johnson, and then he becomes kind of a weekend at Bernie's kind of character in series two. It's great.

It's really good. So yeah Shelly Johnson still haven't worked for like a bit. I'd say I'm like a pretty big fan of trim beats. I still haven't finished the return

Reegs: Have you

Sidey: No, no. Pete and I made a pact that we would watch it, not necessarily together in the same room, but certainly simultaneously.

And we haven't done that. So yeah, definitely need to do that. Yeah.

Reegs: The 2001 French romantic comedy Amélie was something that Guillermo del Toro obviously loved a lot and I enjoyed too it was really lovely and that was about Amélie Poula who was a Parisian waitress and she was a sort of kind of Guardian angel of people around her.

She helps her retired father follow his dreams of travel and she's playing Cupid amongst the the, the patrons of the cafe and playing practical jokes on a cruel green grocer and that sort of thing. So yeah, that was a good one. Do you remember that one? Yeah,

Sidey: got it on DIVD.

Reegs: got it all dubbed. I was in the restaurant with the missus and I

Sidey: well, so.

Dan: Yeah.

well, I, I I was in the restaurant with the missus and I said, Yeah.

My wife spilt a water and he goes, Oh, no problem. I'll get you another one. And I said, Oh, good. Make the next one like sports, if you can.

Reegs: Very

good,

Dan: Thank you.

Remember Boiling Point with Stephen Graham? I keep thinking of that film when we when we talk about these way to related ones, because it's. I mean, there wasn't a lot of laughs in it. Other than just the pressure at the moment. The waiters, the waitresses, they're all rushing around this restaurant.

He's the head chef. And at the same time, he's kind of, his, his life is crumbling around him as he slips into alcoholism and drugs and, and all the rest that was, that was going on. But still.

Reegs: And all done in real

Dan: And all done in real time. real time.

Sidey: I remember the, one of the first interactions at the table was It was when a black waitress went to that table and the guy was clearly a racist, wasn't he?

He was like, no semi's. And he was like, oh, it was, yeah,

Dan: Yeah. I mean, he suppose the realities of, you know, a lot of the time

Sidey: scumbags out there. Yeah.

Dan: the public and, and scumbags. But yeah, it was a decent film and I, I really liked Steven Graham. I look out for stuff that he's, he's in these days. I think he's one of our better British actors.

Sidey: Matilda.

Dan: Matilda

Sidey: It's in that, isn't it? It's in the newer one. What about a couple of Jennifer Aniston ones? Yeah, Rachel Green in friends. So she originally turns up as a sport rich kid and she has to come down to Earth and take a job as well, could we call that a waitress in the coffee shop?

Okay. Kind of blurred the lines between the bar and the

Reegs: Yeah, I think she was waiting tables, was it? Although you never actually see her do any of that, so... No,

Sidey: Didn't see her And then when she eventually does get her big break, the first thing that she has to do is make coffee for all the, yeah, all the big weeks. And then she played a waitress again, of course, in office space.

Yeah. Where they have to wear...

on their

braces they have to decorate their outfits with a certain amount of I can't remember the terminology they used for it It was something terrible like it wasn't bling but it was something cringy like that. It was decent film though. It's Mike Judge, wasn't it?

Yeah, it was good that

Reegs: I've seen it for a long time.

Sidey: It was De Sirono. Yeah, so a couple of those I've got a load of like sitcom ones

Reegs: It's A

Dan: great setting, isn't it? A diner or waiters and waitresses for, for these kind of things. I've got one more that I'd like to mention.

It's it could happen to you. Can you remember that Nick Cage, Bridget Fonda?

Sidey: I haven't seen it.

Dan: have you not it it's it's just a light

Sidey: Does he win the lottery?

Dan: He's a cop Yeah, he's a cop that goes into the the diner hasn't got a tip big tip is in america So they go I tell you what I win the lottery.

I'll come and give you half with this ticket Lo and behold doesn't win. That's the end of the film. No, he wins and they go back and, you know, stuff happens, but it was a big one out at a time. Yeah, yeah. It was a big film at a time and, you know, it's, it's watchable. It's a nice,

Sidey: Slightly off topic, but on the lottery thing, did you ever see the Australian guy, I think it might be in the 80s, where he's won quarter of a million on a scratch card, and so they get the news, like reenact it, and he goes into the same place,

buys it, scratches it, and wins another 250.

Dan: and wins another. I

don't know.

Sidey: Yeah, amazing. I don't know.

So we've got sitcoms and we've got I guess the trope of people who, and it's true to life, I guess, of aspiring actresses, actresses, actors, actresses trying to wait to see why they're trying to do that. There's also the thing of the food's being interfered with, we've sort of touched on it.

But we had Tyler Durden, did you mention him in the end or did you not?

Reegs: Yeah, I was wondering that.

Sidey: I don't think he did, but Tyler Durden, I'd almost forgotten about this, but he, one of his, obviously he doesn't really exist, but

Reegs: him urinating in the

Sidey: he pisses in some soup, doesn't he? He has various different jobs and he like, sort of um,

Dan: Keeps money

Sidey: things along the way, whatever

Reegs: part of Project Mayhem is they, they're all dressed as waiters and waitresses and they get that guy in the toilets and...

Sidey: and... And then the other one, I'm sure we've mentioned it before as well, but it's in Road Trip, it's the French toast scene, where again...

Reegs: more a chef though. The guy here, there's not really a,

Sidey: not a chef though, the guy here, it's not really a... the news to take it back. But yeah, maybe it's a little bit of a grey area, that one, but,

Reegs: Well,

on the sort of trophy thing, a sort of like a sort of surly, I've seen it all.

Ancient southern lady. Is a, is a trope that we've seen a million times. They got one in Hell or High Water, do you remember that? The one that we watched for the pod? Chris Pine and Ben Foster. That brothers who are carrying out a series of small town bank bank robberies. And there's Jeff Bridges as a really racist Texas ranger.

And he, she, he gets his shit handed to him on a plate by like a bull of a waitress in the in one of the scenes that was great. What about working in a McDonald's? You consider that to be a waiter or a waitress?

Sidey: I would say so,

Reegs: Thank God.

Sidey: High cuisine.

Reegs: well, you got Prince Akeem from coming to America, haven't you? He went and worked in McDonald's.

Dan: yeah, of course, yeah. McDonald's. Yeah.

Reegs: And also in the brilliant cloud Atlas,

Dan: Is it brilliant?

I've not seen It

Reegs: We watched it for the pod, but did you not, did you

Dan: I missed that

Reegs: we were split, didn't we? You hated

Sidey: hated it, yeah. I

Dan: Oh, it's one that I'm

Sidey: Pete loves it. Absolutely loves it. I think

Reegs: gotta be, like, one of the most ambitious films ever made, like, serving multiple stories across thousands of years, and with each sort of referencing each other.

I think it's got a beautiful idea at its core, which is kind of an act of creative expression in one time period triggers a revolution of sorts in another. Which is like a really great idea to see that play out at times, but there's some weird shit around it. Anyway. There is a scene, they work in a sort of nightmare, in one of the scene settings in the sort of New Tokyo bit, or New Soul, I think it is.

They work in a sort of nightmarish McDonald's of the future type thing, serving human slop, I think, to others. So,

Sidey: yeah. And

Reegs: It was a wait, she was a wait, she, and she, Somni, whatever her name is, Somni451 is a a waitress in a fast food restaurant, so, hence all that fucking ramble that I just went on.

Dan: Well, I might go on a bit of a ramble you could possibly help me with the the name of the guy I've just Michael Sheen.

It's come to me passengers. He

Reegs: He's a bartender, though, Dan.

Dan: It's kind of a waiter as

Reegs: I have got him on my list, but... Sidey poo pooed it earlier in, you know, in respect of Chris, who...

Dan: Yeah,

Sidey: He's also in Tron. As the, like the host, isn't he, of the nightclub thing.

Reegs: David Bowie, basically.

Dan: Well, we couldn't we, Jim in here, but are we ready to, to whittle it down? I've got a

Reegs: Yeah, I've got one or two more. There was a

Sidey: I don't know if we really liked Up until the point when we just like Hard exited Which was True Blood and Sookie Stackhouse Do you remember her? It's Anna Paquin. She played Rogue in the X Men film. It's really sexy, that show. But it just got a bit too stupid for us, so we, we canned it. But she's a waitress.

And then, I... The other one I wanted to mention was gonna be... I always like to tick off Buffy, but I also usually like to get a Star Trek Next Gen. You know, Whoopi Goldberg's Guinan. She's the... Oh, it's gonna be a bartender though, actually, now I think about it. No, she's out. You're out. Guy, you're gunned.

Reegs: You're gunned, Guinan. What, the French are definitely known for being, like, friendly and all that, and Spider Man 3 has...

Sidey: Oh, it's Bruce Campbell, yeah. playing

Reegs: a friendly French waiter. So that definitely makes sense. And, oh

Sidey: it the Matrid D?

Reegs: Yeah.

Oh, fly me. We not gonna have Mare D's now.

Dan: Top five Maitre'Ds, yeah.

Reegs: And we watched a movie that deconstructed the idea that reality was an illusion. The game. Michael Douglas, and he was really good as the control freak Nicholas Van Orton, whose life becomes pretty crazy, and, and Deborah Cara Unger is a waitress who is, you know, at the center of the story, and you don't know whose side she's on, and what's real, and all that stuff, right until the very end of the movie, so that was pretty good, and in National Lampoon's European Vacation, did you ever see that

Sidey: one?

Reegs: Oh, it's the guy, like,

Dan: Oh, I think I remember.

The

Reegs: Griswolds in a restaurant. I think they're in Paris and the waiter is being that surly French waiter and just telling them that they're scum and they wouldn't know the difference between slop but like smiling and saying it all and the ignorant,

Dan: I was thinking of a different one, when they went to the Munich Beer Festival or something, and there was, various

Reegs: there is one in that, yay

Randy, is it?

The kid sees the girl's tits in the,

Dan: believe he does,

Reegs: They don't make comedies like that anymore, do they? Where, like, the first 25 minutes is building up to seeing a great pair of boobs. Do they, do they make that, actually?

Sidey: They should do.

Dan: Maybe in, in this week's cartoon

Reegs: They should do. Maybe in,

in that? We watched for the pod, she was a

waitress in

Sidey: Oh, of course, yeah, yeah, yeah. Right, should we go over to the Twistersphere?

Reegs: the Twistersphere? Please.

Sidey: We've had quite a few. It's quite, quite a catchy concept, this one.

Ewan Campbell just says the waitress herself, Kerry Russell.

Reegs: Yep.

Dan: Kerry.

Sidey: Kerry. Happy with that? Peter Flambard goes straight away. Plenty of them in Sides favourite Slammin Salmon. This is one we don't mention. Breachy mentions Brad Pitt in Inglourious Bastards. Sorry, Eli Roth.

the

Dan: well. Really? Wow.

Sidey: He punched him and it shot them at the same time. He

does

Reegs: I know

Sidey: about that one actually. what's drawn him into that one. Then another guy, Peter Flambard, he's mentioned well just a screenshot of Pulp Fiction and it is Steve Buscemi as the, as the waiter.

So that's a true thing. And also we have excuse me Flo Dumb and Dumber.

Reegs: yeah. Yeah.

Sidey: What's the soup du jour? Yeah, the

Reegs: the soup of the day.

Sidey: That sounds good, I'll have that. So there's some good ones in there. Dan, what are you going to put in?

Dan: I'm gonna I'm gonna put in Bridget Fonda. It could happen to you.

Sidey: I

Dan: Lottery. Might be in me luck.

Reegs: I am putting in Hell or High Water because I didn't really like that film as much as maybe I should have done.

Sidey: I quite like the Inglourious Basterds

Reegs: Salmon has got...

Sidey: Salmon is good. No. No. I quite like the Inglourious Basterds one.

Reegs: Yeah.

Sidey: Okay, Britchie's one is in. And then Chris can complete this if he bothers to turn up next week.

Dan: cheese.

Sidey: Non existent cheese.

Dan: happening is it?

Reegs: No cheese.

Sidey: we got here a little bit earlier and we kind of like had dinner here.

Dan: We we, yeah. We had a bit more than cheese, didn't we?

Reegs: There's chicken wings and pizza and all sorts.

Sidey: it was good.

Dan: Yeah. Yeah.

Sidey: Because it's Bank Holiday Monday after all.

Dan: Why not

Exactly.

Sidey: Exactly. And that segues very nicely into this week's main feature, which is cop shop.

Reegs: Yeah.

Sidey: 2021.

Reegs: The waitress part is completely lost on me.

Sidey: there isn't one.

Reegs: Right. Okay. Because everything else has been waitress,

Sidey: Yeah. But yeah. Yeah. I was a bit baffled, but here we are.

Reegs: are.

Yeah. Okay. Good. I thought I'd missed

Dan: Well, I suppose, the cops are here to serve us.

Reegs: Oh, that's very

Dan: we go. It's where he must have been coming from. But this this had Gerard Butler in.

Reegs: Yep. And Frank Grillo, who also teamed up with this director in Boss Level. I don't know whether you saw that.

Dan: Did see that, yeah. It was an

Reegs: actiony thing. I enjoyed that.

Dan: it was okay.

Reegs: And Joe Carnahan I like as well. He did The Grey, which I liked a lot more than most, I think. And that was, that was really decent.

He did The A Team as well. So

Dan: And

Reegs: No,

Sidey: no, same. I thought when I flipped onto it, I thought it must've been a Netflix like original thing, but No, it's not. It's a thing.

Reegs: I think we start with the it's the theme from Magnum Force, isn't it? It

Sidey: it is. You're right.

Absolutely right.

It's

Reegs: absolute banger from Lalo Schifrin right out the gate. And it's actually our hero Val, isn't it?

Getting a burger with Cutty from The Cut.

Sidey: Yeah,

Reegs: And,

Sidey: sure is. Yeah, she's, well, she's been around with her Magnum. She's got a big gun.

Dan: Oh,

that's right. Yeah. She's got this long kind of nozzled shooter. Yeah, I think that's what they're

Reegs: Definitely.

Yeah. There's a lot of fetishizing of guns in this and a lot of western tropes and people pulling their guns and that sort of thing.

But mostly there are a bunch of inept cops who've never had to do anything. But yeah, cut you from the cart. Gets a literal checkoffs gun, you know, that trope of

Don't put something in the scene unless you're going to refer to it later. There's a little gun in a present box that he's giving his wife, I think, that's going to come out.

She's going to use it later to save herself.

Dan: And, and yeah, Val gets out the car because there's a disturbance in, on the street or in the courtyard next to them. And Frank Grillo's character has been running along. I think we've

Reegs: we've seen We've seen him interspersed, yeah, with Cut

Dan: of cut in a couple of times, but they meet just outside the...

Reegs: Well, he's in a cop car, right?

And it's like absolutely ridden with bullets, and there's smoke coming from it, and he's on the run sort of

Dan: Oh, that's right, and it, it cracks out, and he, he kind of

Reegs: And he sees the casino in the distance and he sees lights in the car coming from behind him and he makes a calculated decision, I'll go to the casino, and he goes to the casino

essentially to, he strikes the coppers who were already there, being called to a disturbance outside, and he strikes Officer Val.

What's her name? Val Jordan, is it? Or Val?

Sidey: Dunican.

Reegs: Val Dunican. Val Dunican. She's great in this as well, so I

Sidey: Valerie Young.

Reegs: Officer Young. And he strikes her with the intention, you can see, to get...

Sidey: It's safer there than it is...

Reegs: It's safer there

Sidey: Yeah, a couple of times I

Reegs: couple of times.

Sidey: times,

Dan: Just for good measure. And we get a sense then that she's not one to take any shit if you didn't know by the fact that she's kinda loading this massive weapon before then.

And... It's, it's kind of, a strange situation because he did this on purpose,

Reegs: Yeah. It's pretty clear that he's done. It's a calculated move what he's done here.

Sidey: Yeah.

Dan: And, yeah, they throw him in, they throw him in the clink. This

Sidey: And,

Reegs: Yeah.

Sidey: Yeah, even though we know

Reegs: a classic thing.

It's safer in jail. Safer

Sidey: nothing about him,

Reegs: Yeah, even though we know nothing about him, his story will come out and he is taken back and, you know, mugshotted and printed and whatever and put in not with the drunks, you don't go in the same cell as the intoxicated one, so he's put across the way and at the same time we're introduced to the other officers Huber, who's a sort of fairly dysfunctional straight away, looking edgy, sort of fat guy,

Dan: Yeah. But the, but the, the rest of the team, they're all working in this open plan cop shop.

There's an upstairs with a couple of offices where

Reegs: A well stocked armory.

Dan: a well-stocked armory. But they all seem to be very familiar with the day to day and the routine and their, you know, what they're up to. And cut.

Sidey: cut's, the not cut, the cut's.

The by, this is the character's name from the work. So it's we should, I, I can't even pick him

Reegs: is it, in this?

Sidey: Chad Coleman. He plays Dwayne Mitchell. He's the sergeant. So, he's in charge and he comes in and he starts shouting around a few things because they don't really take him that seriously and he's he's got a few things that haven't been done and he keeps badgering Huber about the evidence inventory.

Yeah. Which will be quite important in a bit. And then I think it would do we cut now to The, the, the next forced incarceration, where he, Jared Butler's coming along and he deliberately crashes his

Reegs: into the car. But as they're investigating Grillo's abandoned car, he drives drunk into it at full speed, nearly killing the two officers. He gets out of the car, I think he's still drinking as he goes, and they process him.

They say, oh, what did they say? He smells, smells like Satan's asshole, I think, as

Dan: Yeah, and, and they take him down to the, the same police station, because that's the closest one, even though it's fairly state, close to the state line they're going to process him there and he's then put in the cell opposite.

Reegs: He's got, he's got some insulin on him which he keeps mumbling about, which they could put in a little bucket of whatever lot

Dan: the

Reegs: or whenever they process people or whatever. And yeah, he's put in this, the intoxicated cell

Dan: fountains,

or

whatever

they process

people or whatever,

and yeah, he's put in this, the intoxicated cell. Jared Butler acting as this drunk guy and the next time he turns around he's matching him walking and pacing the, the cell and he starts giving him all this spooky talk and he realizes, oh wait a minute, I'm in, in trouble here and he, I think he, he gives the address of his family, his, his wife and

Reegs: Yeah, that's right.

Dan: as kind of, look, I know exactly where you are and, and what you want and, and everything and now you've got to do what I want.

Reegs: Yeah.

Upstairs, Officer Young and her compatriot Officer Pena are having a little sort of shootout.

They're doing what's it called? Like a high noon, a fast draw type thing in office chairs upstairs, and they're, he's talking about his father used to practice a shot where you'd load a single bullet into the chamber and spin it and fire and shoot, and who knows, that might happen right later in this movie.

And downstairs, the drunk guy that Gerard Butler is sharing a cell with has woken up. And his main thing is to, he gets up and he says ha a lot. And sort of pisses, and immediately... Facts

Sidey: fancies himself, doesn't he?

Reegs: Yeah, he really does get him, so he says, Oh, you look like my stepdad, or something, And ends up in a fight, But then he's absolutely, brutally chopped down, A little, like, punch to the throat, I think.

Yeah. And he's coughing up blood everywhere, And then Butler's shouting, Help, help, we need a medic, he's having a seizure. Lure the cops

Dan: yeah, he knows every trick in the book. And you, you kind of get in this sense then of, you don't. Find out the story of the what and whys you just realize that there's a hit on, on Frank Grillo.

Yeah. And it's not just one guy gonna be trying to take this money. There's, there's a couple coming in.

Reegs: Butler has been hired. He's a, he's a contract killer called Bob Vidic.

Sidey: Yeah.

yeah. Mostly they just say Vick,

Reegs: they just say Vidic

Dan: Played at the back for United for

a couple of seasons, didn't he?

Reegs: Yeah,

Sidey: Yeah. he comes to see what's going on with the, with the fella, his his cellmate. And I think he, he whacks him around the face cause his jaw ends up being dislocated, doesn't it? And so he's able to get out and he takes, he takes the gun, takes the sergeant's gun, and he manages to get up a few rounds, but he doesn't actually hit Grillo before he's overpowered,

Reegs: Well, he's taken down by suddenly officer young has her enormous magnum pointed at him and she, he's like, Oh, he's sort of all bravado, but you've done this before. So she's like, no, I'm really nervous. It's a wonder. I haven't killed you already.

Sidey: But she's

Reegs: Yeah.

Dan: Yeah.

Reegs: But she's great in this scene because she's obviously in every scene She's this slight black woman and these are all macho huge men around her and she's often like completely in control of the situation and you're absolutely rooting for for her as you slowly realize there's not a single good person in this movie like

Dan: that's it. It's it's her, isn't it? Yeah, so they get back into, into

Reegs: She handcuffs Butler to the, to the drunk side of the jail and takes Cuddy back up and gets him

Sidey: resets his jaw as well, doesn't

Reegs: Resets his jaw. She then performs a tracheotomy on is that what it is? She, she slices his throat anyway on the guy who'd been seizured and puts a tube in.

Sidey: had

a thing the other week when we were talking about it And it's another one to add to the list because then we had about four or five that week

Dan: had that in as well, didn't

Reegs: Penny is like, that's the most badass thing I think I've ever seen. So yeah, she's just a great, great character, obviously.

Dan: Yeah, there's now is it the point where the balloon guy comes in?

Sidey: No. No. You get ho first. The fat, the fat cop is really sweaty and he looks dodgy.

It turns out to be dodgy. He, he gets a message. And while he's doing inventory, he takes a bag with him for some reason and then he he just starts taking, he's got orders to, to lift a certain amount, a certain amount of kilo of product from I think he's got some, some fakes that he's replacing he's just taking stuff out of inventory and, and putting it back out on

Dan: which is why he's so slow on that inventory list for his, his captain.

Reegs: and meanwhile he's getting agitated as well because he might have recognized, is it Vid, is it Ick or Grillo? It's Gorilla, isn't it? He's recognized Grillo's character

Dan: He's very

Reegs: a John Doe at this stage. And they, he has, he's getting the fingerprints processed.

Dan: That's right. Yeah, they're, they're all kind of jumping on his computer as we're all trying to find out, or he's getting on information. It's all quite tense as you're trying to find as they're, they're trying to get away with obviously the, the crime and one, you know, that both of these guys are in prison. They're only there because they want to be there and somehow they're gonna come out. But the scene for me is, it picks up when this, this guy comes in with the balloons and...

Sidey: and... Well, it just, it goes from like... 50 miles an hour to like a hundred

Dan: to a hundred miles an hour. So, right at the main reception of the police station, there's one guy who's he's the, the police officers are on, on charge of the counter for the day and he's looking through the mugshots of different

Reegs: Yeah, yeah, yet another incompetent.

Dan: Sure enough, there's, there's a picture of a guy comes up and the guy who's brought in some balloons for, for a present or somebody's birthday or something looks just like this guy and he's

Reegs: saying to him, look at it! You look just like this guy!

Dan: goes, first of all, he goes, aw, don't say that and he goes, no, for sure, for sure you do.

And he goes, oh, well, isn't that a shame? And then you just get this Cold ass killer who is first puts him down and then soon

Reegs: Who is first puts him down. He puts a bullet in his head, and the guy just stands up and walks along and he's going WHOA I'D LOVE TO KNOW WHAT'S GOING THROUGH YOUR MIND BUDDY He's like, well over the top straight away, this character, Antony Lam, he's great. I don't I This actor, what was his name? Toby Huss, or something like

Sidey: Yeah, Toby Haas,

Reegs: I'm not aware of him, but he's

Dan: No, he stole his scene and, and all that he was in actually because

Reegs: He face plants into a table, that officer, and as soon as that happens an emergency, an EMT team, an emergency medical team rush in, they've been called to deal with the tracheotomy

Dan: quickly takes off his

Reegs: takes off his cap, oh, the guy's through there, and they're like, oh, what's happened to him?

Oh, he fell over, and they turned him, and he just cold blooded kills them straight away. Next in, I think, is Officer Pena, that we've also had a little bit of affection for, he's just gunned down straight away. And then it becomes Val, and he suddenly magics out this Uzi, Uzi with like an enormous magazine, like, I've never seen a

Dan: it's like a mini Uzi with a massive magazine and he's just spraying everybody.

Reegs: And she ends up legging it down to the the jail cell where they're, where Gorilla and Butler are currently incarcerated and locking herself in there with this unbelievably tense scene where she's. got bulletproof glass behind her and he's spraying like bullets and she's resetting the Passing the passcode so only she knows it and she has to enter it in twice while the bullets are flying and we see Her like cool under

Dan: always those things, isn't it? And enter, again, like, you know, code accepted if you put yeah, it

Reegs: And he does eventually shoot through the glass. Not, and so she turns around to get a shot off just as she sort of falls back through the door. And as she gets through the door, she realizes she's been shot. Yeah. And then worse than that, it comes out, she shot herself .

Sidey: Yeah.

it's a Rick O'Shea, yeah.

Dan: yeah.

In, in that little room

Sidey: Jared Butler is, like, pretty quick to point that out. And like, kind of humiliate

Dan: see all these kind of

Impressions on the door just after she she's got in and you think a back was still on it I was thinking if he still shoots then that was still her even you know But they got away with that and well, she doesn't get away much though because she's practically just lie up lay up against that door

Bleeding out and she now has to make the decision to let one of these guys out to help her and they're both Kind of suggesting it should be them.

She's got a Cold, hard, killer and gorilla who's been, he's hit her. He's

Reegs: Well, this is where Grillo offers up his story a

Dan: little bit. Yeah.

Reegs: he? He's basically a con man called Teddy Merdetto, and I think he was a fixer trying to Arrange for a the local attorney general who's been killed that's been going on in the background

To take some money. I think from a mob boss and the Fenton that the attorney general is said no And it's turned into a contract killing, Teddy himself nearly being killed, and then a pair of corrupt cops then end up

taking

out the FBI, don't they, I think and that's how Teddy got free at the beginning of the movie.

Dan: And it's, yeah, so it's a real shit storm and she's bleeding to, to death and she knows that she's got to trust one of these guys, so she throws the keys over to Frank and

much to Vidic, kind of, You know, he's, he's disappointed.

He's thinking, fuck, you know, you, you've blown this now, but I was watching, I was watching it thinking that's the only play you're not going to give it to this other guy. Cause he will just

Sidey: just bang, he's dead. And

Dan: and then he'll probably shoot you and go out with.

Reegs: Well, no, she says, you know, well, he's like a contract, he, yeah. There is some little mumbling about the morality

Dan: I mean, you and things like that. But yeah, she is a long way before she's going to trust him anyway. And, and so. She needs this medipack, which is somewhere in the kitchen and he's got to bring it back. She's not going to make it without it. She's, you know, so Frank goes right. He gives her the gun.

She gives him the gun. He's got the keys. He's out and he's away. And it's, it's a tense kind of environment

Reegs: well, we get a bit of cat and mouse now, don't we? Because simultaneously while this has been happening Anthony Lamb and hoer have had to horribly mercilessly gun down the rest of their crew, including the hor, the barns, who's on his.

Knees begging for his life when,

Dan: As a friend.

Yeah, yeah.

Reegs: and they're trying to break through the wall of the cell using a sledgehammer. This is where he talks about, oh, you'll be more like Thor. It's a great little

Dan: Yeah.

Reegs: to Chris Hemsworth

Dan: well, he, he's just saying, you know, I'm not gonna do anything. I've done my job. I've, I've been killing people today.

That's pretty exhausting. And he's gonna, I had to kill my boss. And he was like,

Reegs: when Grillo comes into that room and he just sprays machine gun fire, I think all he does is kill the cop who's already on the floor, doesn't he? Shoots him in the back of the head, and then, and he misses Huber and Lam, and then there's a bit of cat and mouse with Lam.

And then Vidic is also now freed by Officer Young.

She's now hedging her betts like, fuck,

Dan: because he isn't back. Yeah. And, and they, he keeps saying, told you, told you you should have let him go because let, let me go because

Reegs: he's

also found out she withheld some information that his wife and his ex-wife and kid or, yeah.

Something had been killed as well. So

Dan: again, that was, yeah. A, a deciding factor maybe that you thought as a viewer, this is, this is gonna.

The whole way through it then he, he slowly gets through Grillo what's his character's name? Sorry. I'm cute. Teddy,

Reegs: Teddy Murdetto. Teddy.

Dan: Teddy

Sidey: Maretto.

Dan: Teddy Moreto. He, he, he manages to they have this kind of shower scene where he shoots Blue Man.

And,

Reegs: That's when he's singing Freddy's Dead.

Dan: But Gerald Bartler has also kind of come up then, and he's, he's got him, hasn't he, he

Reegs: He offers Grillo parlay. Yeah, and he's and he

Dan: He never picks

Reegs: by shooting him

Dan: yeah

Yeah, he shoots them both and, and then goes back and you see him in the kitchen with the medipack. He, he's looking at that, but he has a look in the fridge because he's quite hungry.

So he just has a sandwich and he hears then this voice behind him and he goes, ah. Hungry were you, or something, and Val has managed to drag herself into the the kitchen area and set herself on a on a stall and wait for him and she's gonna, she's about to shoot him or, or make sure he doesn't get away again.

Reegs: Yeah, yeah. And they have then a great, she shot herself up with adrenaline and they have a great little

Dan: Yeah.

she's really cool. She's really, really cool. She just, yeah, she says that like, yeah, I'll just give myself a shot of adrenaline and I'm feeling ready, you know?

Reegs: And there's a big long shootout Grillo breaks into the armory, she uses the gun from earlier that Cutty's wife had, there's a big big shootout, and then eventually she shoots him in the back with the one shot in the chamber just as Officer Pena had talked about earlier, because at this point Grillo had also set the entire police station on fire, so it's like hell around them.

Dan: Had also set the the ambulance and the, and the other police she's called in some code 20

or something

Reegs: 3 or whatever it is. Everyone in the world's gonna come

Dan: or whatever it is. Everyone in the

Reegs: But who is coming is the corrupt cops from, I couldn't believe it when they came through. I was like, oh my god, is it ever gonna get any nicer for this woman?

And it's not, it's the corrupt cops because they shoot her, don't

Dan: they?

yeah. And they, they, well, they come in and it's, it is a big switch of people shooting different people and people coming out and suddenly outta nowhere just as she's about to be shot. Yeah. And killed bleeding. Vi comes out, comes, I thought we'd already seen him shot, but you didn't see him die. So, he can still in film world get back up and, and do what he did, which was shoot.

The guy who's just, and then Golos still begging for his life. Yeah. And he has absolutely zero. Kind of, you don't see that, but you know that he's

Reegs: shot about four or five times in the head, isn't he? Yeah.

Sidey: it's pretty ruthless, yeah.

Dan: done, and

And, the police officer,

Reegs: oh, we forgot about with Hoover downstairs. He also

him.

Oh yeah, he kneecaps him and then sprays. He tasers him. Kneecaps him and then sprays pepper spray on him.

on his, In, the wounds, in

Dan: wounds. Yeah.

Reegs: one. Yeah.

Sidey: Yeah.

Dan: His, yeah. Yeah, it was,

Reegs: And then, yeah, I mean it ends with she gets carted off in an ambulance and he drives off to Chicago with the head of Anthony Lamb in his duffel bag that he promised that he was gonna take back to the Chicago mob boss. And then when Freddy's Dead comes on the radio, she decides the adventure hasn't ended yet.

Commandeers the ambulance.

Dan: Yeah, that's it. Kicks the the paramedics out. And they're both heading down the highway listening to the same song. Singing, and she's singing like Teddy's dead. Cause he's changed the name obviously.

Lolz.

Reegs: Yeah,

Dan: that is that. It was a, an adventure. I,

Reegs: I don't think we got a lot of the style over because it is quite a heavily

Dan: movie. It is, yeah.

Reegs: stylized type movie, you know cartoonish and macho and

But then the best character in it is a tiny black woman whose father is a grandfather was a nazi.

Dan: It's a strange

mix.

Reegs: Yeah

This was great.

Dan: I really liked it. I, I thought it had just the amount of different characters in it. I thought if it's just a Gerald Butler action movie I dunno how much I'm gonna be into it. But I was pleasantly surprised that he wasn't in it so much. But when he was, it was, it was good.

Enjoyed him. And Frank Willow as well,

little slower. Oh, it didn't for me. No, I, I felt this went okay. I was in the mood for this kind of film. It was an easy. It's kind of crude and it's sort of proudly sort of vulgar. And if you

Reegs: of crude, and it's sort of proudly sort of vulgar and if you like that sort of thing, which I do.

Dan: no. It didn't do it for me.

Sidey: I didn't like it, no, it didn't do it for me.

Dan: for whatever reason, when I

Sidey: No, I don't think so, but just for whatever reason, when I just, when I happened to sit down and watch this film, I didn't particularly enjoy it.

I found it, like, especially when the... Lamb character came in. I think that's where it kind of lost me. It was just a bit

Yeah, it was maybe a bit too cartoony for me at this point. But I probably like other things that are very similar. I dunno, it's a bit of a weird one. Maybe I, I need to give it another, another go.

But, but this

Dan: It, it, it, it felt like it, you know, when you said the, it ramped miles an hour when he came in, I actually thought the film got a lot better after that as well. I mean, I was enjoying it. In the first place. But I, I liked the, the cat and mouse kind of bits in almost die hardish in the, in the police station.

You know, they were running

Sidey: you know, they're running on the floor. Lovely. Well, it's a lot better than that. Yeah, I think so.

Reegs: Well it's a lot better than that. I would suggest it's a lot better than

Dan: It was a pleasant surprise for me.

Reegs: No, I enjoyed this.

Sidey: I enjoyed this.

Dan: Recommend. Kids stuff.

Sidey: Yeah, I'm guessing Chris knows what a huge fan I am of Mr Bean.

Dan: That's why he's mentioned the animated

Sidey: yeah, but we are in the animated world So perhaps there's a chance that this will be good. I'm honestly if I can detest the live action Proper rowing accident. Mr. Bean.

Dan: Was you ever a fan at any point ever?

Sidey: Honestly hate it and bear in

Reegs: you like physical comedy

Sidey: like that.

No and I like Blackadder series 4 to me

Dan: 3, and 4 I know,

Sidey: high point and then Mr. Bean to me is like the depths of awfulness like it's such a huge

Dan: it is. It is a very different body of work.

Sidey: Yeah, so it's a little bit of trepidation going into this and and we're back on theme with a restaurant themed thing And so yeah, here we are and it's It's the animation style.

It's like exaggeratedly thick black outline lines around the character. Kind of a Hanna Barbera sort of

Dan: But even thicker lines,

Reegs: And not primary colours, and not pastels, but somewhere in between.

Yeah.

Dan: Yeah.

yeah, and it, they all kind of stick out and...

Reegs: I think like you mentioned and I couldn't stop looking at it afterwards is the fact that their ankles and their feet don't meet

Sidey: Yeah.

Everything else does, I

Reegs: everything else does

Dan: Yeah, their feet remain planted where their, their legs and bodies hover.

the end of

Reegs: the end their stumps the

Sidey: How difficult would it be to just continue that black line up a bit?

Reegs: the choice is

Dan: It's cost saving though, you know, all those little bits that add up to a full character one day. I

Reegs: Do you reckon it's like a brilliant artist, but he's just like, I can't do feet. So I'm just going

Sidey: No, you can't do ankles.

Reegs: yeah, yeah. Can't do ankles. So I'm just going to miss that bit out.

Dan: Just gotta draw an L.

Reegs: will notice.

Sidey: notice.

Dan: We noticed.

Sidey: anyway, it's,

Reegs: getting himself ready for dinner. Putting a bow tie on. Is that iconic? I wanted to say iconic, but I don't know whether he does wear an iconic

Dan: think it's traditional for Bean. Certainly when he's going out on a

Sidey: and whose, whose birthday was it?

Dan: It was his.

Sidey: Yeah. And they're going to the restaurant.

Reegs: It was the Haute Cuisine des Tofs.

Dan: And when you say they, you

Sidey: Teddy.

Dan: Teddy.

Sidey: His, his cuddly toy Teddy and Mr. Beam. He pulls up

Reegs: not quite speaking, although I thought he spoke a bit more, sort of, he verbalised a lot more in this than I remembered Mr Bean any

Sidey: And it is, it is Rowan Atkinson as well. Yeah,

Reegs: But it's mostly that...

Sidey: Yeah, but there are a few words and if you watch it with the words on you can follow it even more clearly But he pulls up outside The restaurant in his let's say again iconic mini sort of shitty green colored mini

Reegs: He padlocks it.

Sidey: And the major d straight away is like being a prick about that

Reegs: He's a snooty French waiter, can you believe

Sidey: Yeah, no stereotyping at all

Reegs: So

Sidey: says your car's a piece of shit like get it out the fucking way

Reegs: But Bean's not inclined to do it until he sees the enormous other stereotype, the, the chef, who sort of threateningly waves a

Sidey: pin, I think,

yeah,

Reegs: I think.

Dan: And so, yeah, he, he moves on. Eventually

Reegs: Wait, he moves his car about a foot, and says, is that alright?

Sidey: Well, no, the limousine just, the limousine pulls up and just pushes it out of the

Reegs: out of the way.

Pushes it out of the way, yeah.

Dan: Important people coming through there's a celebrity and his ravishing,

Sidey: Hamm

Reegs: What would you say you, you noticed first about

Dan: Her red hair she had long long red hair didn't she like jessica rabbit?

kind of figure

Reegs: She had other proportions of Jessica Rabbit

Sidey: She had an enormous hits child.

Reegs: this is definitely a child's thing, I'm pretty

Dan: Yeah, they

Sidey: it, I watched it on my daughter's profile.

I always watch the kids' stuff on that. I don't want it. Like

Reegs: mutating your algorithm.

Sidey: So this is definitely for kids, but she did have enormous tears. I mean,

Dan: they rested on the table. And then she kind of rested her arms on them and had to move her arms almost around

Sidey: But she's she's the kind of trophy presented as a kind of trophy

Reegs: I think she would have back pain,

Sidey: and he The actor guy, the celeb, is like a kind of Johnny Bravo. Yeah. He's got a big blonde quiff, like big jutty out chin. He bangs on about his fourth Oscar and all this sort of stuff. But like a complete diva entitled prick.

Dan: Yeah. And of course they're fawning over him

Reegs: Bean sits at the wrong table, doesn't he? Have we done that

Dan: No, Bean's getting the,

the

Reegs: the champagne on the go and all that, but it's actually for the big

Dan: Well, he's, he's making a series of fuck ups as well. He tucks his, the, the tablecloth in

Reegs: As he walks off here,

Dan: point and walks off and then he realises it's actually Teddy who's... Walked off with the tablecloth tied to him. And he moves to another table but all the time he seems to be catching the eye of the celebrity's girlfriend

Sidey: finds him really funny, doesn't she? Yeah. Yeah,

Reegs: And endearing because she sees him playing with his

Dan: And and he's

Reegs: he sets on fire at one

Dan: Whenever she's been talked to though, or she talks she's kind of shouted down by a celebrity guy

Sidey: Yes.

Dan: Not very

Sidey: he definitely reminded me of Jake.

Yeah. From once were warriors.

Reegs: Yeah. It was

Sidey: that there was absolutely a domestic violence undertone. So now we've in there

Reegs: we've, got this going on and then Bean of course he so a waiter, this is how it ties into the theme.

'cause a waiter slips on some water that bean spilled when he had to put out his teddy bear in a lobster tank. And the, the waiter slips ends up with a bowl of soup on his face. So the snooty maitre d forces bean to work as a waiter

Dan: That's

Reegs: right at the restaurant.

Dan: And suddenly he's serving now and, and taking the...

Sidey: The famous guy wants the lobster. The

Dan: famous guy wants the lobster there. The girlfriend, he goes, no, no, ladies

first. She wants fish and chips. He's going for the lobster and he goes, oh, okay.

Right. And he makes what he has to get in the

Reegs: a snorkel and he sort of improvises some crude scuba diving gear.

Dan: he tricks this rather big and clever lobster

Sidey: Well the proportions go all crazy because originally there was a crab and a lobster in and it looked...

fairly small, but as soon as we're focused on it now, the lobster is almost bigger than him.

Dan: to the size of their tanks today.

Sidey: yeah. And the tank's a lot bigger. It's like a swimming pool. And he goes in and he, he, he tries to bait the lobster first with the prawn on a bit of fishing line and the lobster just cuts the line and eats the prawn.

I have to be more creative here. So, what he does after he's improvised this scuba thing, he puts a mirror in front of it. Like, have you ever seen, have you ever seen a Siamese fighting a fish?

Reegs: Yes.

Sidey: If you share them, they do what the lobsters do, it just goes mad and starts trying to like, it's giving it all that, lol, and and he's able to then somehow...

Have you ever picked up a lobster? You just literally turn it upside down and it...

Reegs: What does it do?

Sidey: just, all its legs go in and it just like, goes completely calm. It doesn't... Calm? Yeah, yeah, same, lobsters, maybe any crustacean,

you

turn it upside down and they just like, they almost go to sleep. So anyway, he takes it into the, well he's in his pants and he's fighting it with a ladle, isn't he?

Yeah.

He's doing like a sword fight while it's trying to like, pinch him, and then the obnoxious French chef grabs it and is trying to put it into the pan. That's right. Have you ever done that?

Reegs: done that? I don't know if they

Sidey: I don't know if they scream or it's just the air, like, escaping or whatever.

Don't really have a problem with it. Dan,

Dan: no,

not my thing. But this,

we, we still haven't we still had chance for somebody to make a joke about her cans or some such thing and

Reegs: it was me.

Dan: yeah, no it was, yeah, it was getting all a little bit weird before

Reegs: rage quits, doesn't he? And you know, Bean, Bean ends up having to fashion a lobster out of a out of a carrot to appease,

Sidey: Yes, because the lobster escapes through the, like, looks like a...

Like a rubbish, rubbish hatch out into the, into the street and it escapes you there. So he doesn't have the lobster to serve, so he improvises with some carrot.

I

Dan: Well, yeah, I thought he might go for that it's it's served with with much you know, fanfare and and he even has a go. So he's obviously disguised it well enough. He

Sidey: I

Dan: it like a,

Sidey: I would've been able to know the difference between a carrot

Dan: Yeah, they're both orange, you know, so,

Sidey: isn't,

Dan: Well, no, well, he sussed it. He said it's a carrot,

Reegs: Yeah, but only after he'd taken a couple of bites. So I

Sidey: matri d says, is it too fresh?

Reegs: He

Sidey: Yeah.

Dan: He,

kind of goes really angry and beats the shit out of Bean, then. Which seems a bit harsh. He's thrown him out into the garbage and he's towering above him ready to,

Sidey: kill him, I think. Execute him that one. Yeah.

Reegs: going to beat him to death.

There's no doubt about it.

Dan: The lobster who is Previously escaped is, is then right next to

Sidey: Well, because I don't think we made it clear that actually Bean did intervene. He stopped the chef from putting it into the boiling water. So the lobster owes him one.

Reegs: yeah he does, yeah.

Dan: He recognised that.

Sidey: it does. It does. And so

Dan: think that was the moral of the tale.

Reegs: and he and the lobster goes after the celebrity.

I think. Comically sort of snipping his trousers and the paparazzo get him as he is running off. And then Bean meanwhile Fox off with the, with the actress and Fox are in the back of the mini on the way. That

Dan: met too movement thing going on, possibly. But bean has got a photograph of him with Jessica Rabbit.

Reegs: Yeah.

Sidey: Basically. Yeah.

Reegs: And then he goes home and eats his birthday cake completely in one entire gulp, including the

Sidey: Including the cupcake, what do you call it? The case that you pour the, like, he doesn't take anything off. And then, yeah, he, he has two goes at the candle. He

Reegs: regurgitates the candle and eats it again.

Sidey: Yeah, my message says that's like you eating the fucking eating the matches.

Dan: She's not wrong.

Sidey: Yeah. I don't think that's fair. Yeah, so. And that's how it ends, yeah. This is better than the live action, but let's not.

Dan: But not a lot

Sidey: That's not to say that I would watch another one.

Dan: Well I, well I nearly did, yeah, you were threatening. Yeah, well I, I tried to press stop, but it went to next episode. It wasn't the worst thing I've ever seen

Sidey: It is actually okay, it's

Dan: But, it did seem a little bit weird. You didn't need to, like for kids TV, you don't need to make

Sidey: Her breasts were... That

Reegs: It That seemed

Dan: I just don't get that, I just don't

Reegs: Was that just like one for the dads, or,

Sidey: don't know because it was so exaggeratedly...

Reegs: so exaggeratedly... Their boobs were like as big as the act the I was going to say actors, the characters face, weren't

they?

Sidey: were.

They were

Dan: Well, they, they were drawn to, they were drawn, they were drawn to be sort of noticeable and, you know, or, and you, and they made a joke about sort of, you know, cans or whatever, and you think, wow, really, I.

There's so many other jokes that you could do around kids like it doesn't have to be anything to do with

Reegs: Tits. Yeah, yeah, it's a good point, Dan, yeah.

Dan: Otherwise, if you're comfortable with

Reegs: strong recommend.

Dan: And

so we come to the end of yet another And no paid so it should

Sidey: Yeah, there's no Reegs next week.

Dan: Yeah

Sidey: Yeah. And no Pete. So it's me, you... It's a good

one. Yeah.

it's the best one ever. Me, you and probably Chris. Chris just nominated, so it's either me or you.

Probably me then.

Dan: Okay, oh. Semi sexy. I,

Sidey: we'll work,

Dan: we'll, we'll figure something out. This is going to be exciting. Wow. You're, you're, you're going to be...

Reegs: gonna be... In the, in the big smoke, Dan.

Sidey: Capital City.

Reegs: capital city. I fear, honestly, every time I go to London, I'm like, I am like Fieldmouse. You know, from Townmouse and Field...

Dan: Just looking up. Woo! Have you got a stick with a cloth kind of knapsack in the back? Before

Yeah,

Sidey: Yeah, well, I hope you get away alright.

Reegs: Yeah, yeah, me too.

Sidey: Sounds right. All that remains is to say, Sidey signing

Reegs: remains

Dan: out. Dan's gone.